Blog Archives - Paul E. Wanvig

Category Archives for "Blog"

One of the biggest downturns in my life!

One of the biggest downturns in my life!

How Dr. Thomas Rau M.D, the founder of Swiss Biological Medicine appeared to me in the twelfth hour. 

Written by: Paul E. Wanvig, published in English: 4. April 2019

First published in Medium Magazine (Norway) 01.2018

My journey from burnout to living an enlightened life has been a rollercoaster, which though exciting, has also been very challenging. In this article, I am sharing with you the experience of one of the lowest points in my life and what went wrong last year (2017). You will also see how I found the solution to my several of my biggest health problem, and how it can be of benefit to you too.

2017 was one of the hardest years since my burnout in 2003 that almost killed me. For the past fifteen years, I have done everything in my power to find a solution to the problem that caused my health crash in '03.

I have found answers to the other important mysteries: how to fill my life with happiness, joy, meaning, abundance and love. I thought I was close to figuring out how to fully regenerate my physical health, but then I collapsed again at the beginning of 2017.


Interview with Dr. Thomas Rau

Topic: Introduction to Swiss Biological Medicine

Here are some highlights of the interview:

  • The philosophy behind the clinic's exceptional results.
  • How close to 100% of the patients with CFS/ME and Lyme disease (borreliosis), even in advanced stages, get healed.
  • Why the use of antibiotics in the treatment of Lyme disease is harmful.
  • Why the clinic has such good results in the treatment of breast cancer, prostate cancer, and other cancers without the use of surgery, radiation, and chemotherapy by curing the causes of cancer.
  • Why the preventive removal of breasts after a genetic test to avoid cancer later in life is meaningless.
  • Why wisdom teeth, cavitations, root fillings, and implants often are the main cause of chronic disease.
  • And several other exciting topics.

More interviews with Dr. Rau

You can see all the exciting interviews I did with Dr. Thomas Rau here.

The first shock

Since orthodox Western medicine failed to find a cure for my ailment, I had decided to seek alternatives in complementary medicine. Starting in 2004, I pursued every avenue I could find and spent thousands of hours learning and subjecting myself to functional medicine, acupuncture, homeopathy, traditional Chinese medicine, meditation, feng shui, astrology, shamanism and much more. I felt I was close to a breakthrough, because I could feel myself getting better by the day.

But during the last few months of 2016, I began to sense something was wrong with my body, even though I couldn't put a finger on it. It all came to a head during my first seminar in Norway in January 2017. There were more than 100 seminar participants eager to learn about the practical uses of shamanism in their daily lives, but for the first time in my life, I could not muster the energy to conduct the seminar.

I felt completely empty after the first day. I was unsure if I could continue, and I had thoughts of possibly needing to cancel the seminar. Somehow, I was able to mobilize enough energy to finish the seminar reasonably well.

The biggest downturn

Over the next few months, things began to get a lot worse. It got harder for me to teach my seminars and travel for them. I had to cancel many appointments, because I was always falling ill. I ended up taking a summer vacation for three months, but it was of no help at all.

Although I'm an optimist by nature, this got me very worried. I began to prepare myself to make major changes in my professional life, but these thoughts made me feel miserable. It seemed that my body was becoming too weak for me to continue doing what I love most—holding seminars and counselling people on how to find their path and to get back to being themselves.

On the other hand, I was frustrated because I had spent many years, time, energy, and financial resources to look for solutions to get in shape again. How was it, that my body could no longer produce enough energy anymore, almost overnight?

It seemed to make no difference that I had excellent nutrition with a hyperallergic diet without gluten, sugar, milk, and soy, which included low FODMAP, and so on. Losing more than 40 kilograms (90 pounds) helped little. Healing my severe sleep apnea with more than 25 breath stops per hour and no longer needing a CPAP machine (breathing machine) also helped little for my lack of energy.

It helped little that my IBS (irritable bowel syndrome), Leaky Gut (leaky bowel) and SIBO (overgrowth of small intestinal bacteria) were healed, and that for the first time, I had no upset stomach aches, pains, and cramps. It helped little that I had healed my fatty liver, which now was in perfect condition. It helped little that I went through a variety of diagnoses from both Western school medicine and complementary medicine.

Every professional I met gave me the same answer, over and over again: “We find nothing wrong with you, Mr. Wanvig...”

Yet I could feel that there was something wrong with my body. I could, among other things, feel the inflammation in my head. My face and gums felt swollen and inflamed. So many thoughts began to flood my mind. Was this just my imagination and hypochondria? Was this depression? I had visited a number of dentists, both traditional and alternative, and all of them said my teeth and my gums were completely healthy.

In the twelfth hour

One evening in late August, I came across a lecture by Dr. Thomas Rau, Medical Director of Europe's largest and most successful clinic in biological and complementary medicine, the Paracelsus Clinic in Switzerland. In recent years, the clinic had treated more than 30,000 patients from 80 countries for cancer, burnout (CFS/ME), Lyme disease (borreliosis), MS, Morbus Crohns, ulcerative colitis, and all types of chronic diseases with very good results.

I had known about the clinic for several years, but I hadn't really studied what they were doing. This time, I read all the books by Dr. Rau, as well as reviewed his lectures and every other material he had published. Dr. Rau and the Paracelsus Clinic said they were experts in cases like mine: those who had more or less been given up on by orthodox medicine.

The Frist Step

Three months later, I sat in the office of Dr. Rau, as both a patient and a journalist. I had spent two days at the clinic going through intensive diagnosis using both Western school methods and methods of biological medicine that I had never heard of before, to find the causes of my chronic condition.

The first station I was sent to when I arrived was the dentist, who took a panorama and a three-dimensional x-ray of my teeth and gums. Dr. Rau presented the results of this first. He lifted his eyebrows when he saw the pictures of my teeth.

"Here we probably have one of the main reasons why you are chronically ill and that no therapy has worked on you. You have a strong inflammation in the pockets around your upper wisdom teeth that are hidden under the gum" he said. He then explained the health consequences of having hidden wisdom teeth with inflammation, root fillings, cavitations, implants, and metals in the mouth (including amalgam).

"In more than 70 percent of all cancer patients we have at the clinic, the main reason behind the cancer lies in the dental health of the patients. Therefore, we always send all patients to our dental clinic first to take a 3D and panorama image of the teeth,” he continued.

Dr. Rau also said that it helped little what types of treatments and therapies I was being treated with unless the root causes of the disease are removed, like my infected wisdom teeth. My wisdom teeth had caused me trouble for many years, but I didn't know it was a potentially serious problem. The inflammation had significantly reduced my body's ability to regulate itself, thus blocking my body's own self-healing powers.

Frustration and relief

At first I was relieved that someone finally found something wrong with me at all that could be the reason for my chronic fatigue. But I was also frustrated because I had been to several expert dentists who found nothing wrong with me. The last dentist I visited the previous year even had a professor's title in holistic dentistry, and he repeated what the other dentists had said: “There's nothing wrong with you, Mr. Wanvig.”

How could dentists not find such obvious problems that even I could pinpoint in the 3D images Dr. Rau presented to me? The reasons can be many, but I think that lack of understanding and knowledge about inflammation and consequences of hidden wisdom teeth, inflamed cavitations, root fillings, implants, etc., as well as lack of effective treatment methods to cure inflammation and such problems, are high on the list.

In addition, most dentists (at least in Norway and Germany) will avoid the delicate surgery I needed to remove my wisdom teeth, because they were in close contact with my sinuses.

The Paracelsus Clinic uses a comprehensive system for treatment before, during, and after dental surgery to avoid problems, such as infections, and for making sure that the holes created in the jawbone during surgery heal fully within 3–6 weeks.

“If the dentist is not an expert in this type of procedure, it can cause major problems for the patient,” said Dr. Rau.

In article 2, I will share an interview with the dentist who performed the surgery on me, and you will find out about what they do at the dental clinic and how the surgery went.

Article series about Swiss Biological Medicine and Dr. Thomas Rau

GET FREE ACCESS!

Paul E. Wanvig is a Neoteric Shaman, entrepreneur, journalist, author, speaker, bio-hacker, spiritual teacher & encouraging optimist dedicated to helping you and your family live a Fulfilled Life and ending the stress and burnout epidemic by Utilizing the Best of Modern and Ancient Scientific Practices, Medicine and Technology.

Sign up to get VIP access to his upcoming eBooks, online video trainings and valuable weekly health tips for FREE!

Serious illnesses can originate from the teeth!

Serious illnesses can originate from the teeth

In more than 70 percent of Dr. Thomas Rau´s patients, one or more of the main causes of cancer and most forms of chronic disease is related to the teeth.

Written by: Paul E. Wanvig, published in English: 4. April 2019

First published in Medium Magazine (Norway) 02.2018

Dr. Thomas Rau and the Paracelsus Clinic in Switzerland uses biological dental treatment as an important tool for curing serious diseases in patients who have tried "every" treatment method without success. In more than 70 percent of his clients, one or more of the main causes of cancer and most forms of chronic disease is related to the teeth. This is based on their statistics, where more than 30,000 seriously ill patients from 80 countries have been treated.

It took me 15 years and a great number of dentists, doctors, and other specialists before I finally find out that one of the main causes of my chronic disease state was two hidden wisdom teeth with infections in my upper jaw.

In the first article about my experience with the Paracelsus Clinic, titled "One of the biggest downturns in my life!", I described the background of my illness and my first meeting with Dr. Rau.


Unable to diagnose the problems

A year before I ended up in the Paracelsus Clinic, I visited a dentist who was a professor in holistic dentistry. He had his title hung on his wall, so when he repeated what other dentists had said... "There's nothing wrong with you, Mr. Wanvig..." I was inclined to believe him.

However, my troubles persisted. So after my visit to the dentist at Paracelsus Clinic, I began to wonder why the numerous dentists I had visited couldn't find obvious problems that even I could see in the most recent 3D images.

The reasons could be many, but I think there is a lack of understanding and knowledge about hidden inflammation and the effects of wisdom teeth, cavitations, root-fillings, implants, amalgam, etc., as well as a lack of effective treatment methods. In addition, many dentists will avoid the difficult procedure I went through to remove my wisdom teeth, among other things, because the teeth were in contact with my sinuses.

The Paracelsus Clinic uses a comprehensive system for treatment before, during, and after dental surgery to avoid problems such as infections, and for making sure that the holes created in the jawbone during surgery heal fully within 3–6 weeks. 

"If the dentist is not an expert on such types of surgery, it can cause major problems for patients," said Dr. Thomas Rau. You can see several exciting interviews with him here.

Interview with my dentist

This is an interview with Dr. Gunnar Reifert who was my dentist at the Paracelsus Clinic.

Topic: Serious illnesses can originate from the teeth

Here are some highlights of the interview:

  • Why dental health is central to your overall health condition.
  • The connection between the teeth and organs of the body and how problems related to the teeth can adversely affect the organs.
  • The main problems with dental health. Why root canals, jawbone cavitations, galvanic currents, etc. can cause health problems.
  • The Clinic's unique methodology for preventing infections after surgery.
  • You will also see some clips from my surgery...

The biggest problems

In most of the patients with severe disease, the Paracelsus Clinic often finds various problems with dental health as one of the major causes of the disease. According to Dr. Rau, it is difficult to cure a chronic disease without first diagnosing the root cause of the illness. So, every patient at their clinic must first undergo a check at the dental department. One of the things that astonished me was how many dentists make mistakes with root canal fillings.

Root canal fillings are often performed by regular dentists when the nerve (pulp) in the tooth root is dead or damaged due to a bacterial infection. The nerve is excavated, and the root canal is filled with a hard material.

Such fillings are a taboo at the Paracelsus Clinic, as they can cause major health consequences due to bacterial infections and toxins that remain in and around the rotten tooth. Therefore, all patients with severe or chronic disease are obliged to remove all root canal fillings.

"Without this, it is difficult to cure the cause of severe chronic disease. The dead tooth must be removed, possibly replaced by an implant, a bridge or the like of ceramics," said Dr. Gunnar Reifert.

Bacterial Infections

The books "The Toxic Tooth: How a root canal could be making you sick" by Dr. Robert Kulacz, DDS and Thomas E. Levy, MD and “Root Canal Cover Up” by George E. Meining describes the serious consequences of root canal fillings. Additional I recommend to watch the Netflix documentary "Root Cause" who follows a man's 10-year search for the underlying cause of his chronic illnesses after being exposed to dental root canal procedure's harmful risks.

The jaw bone consists of a myriad of tiny cavities where bacterial infections can occur locally in small areas (which are not necessarily related to the root canal fillings). Another type of cavitation occurs in areas of the jaw with dead bone tissue that may occur after drawing out a wisdom tooth.

Cavitation in the jaw bone does not need to be associated with pain or other symptoms, but the toxic substances from infections can reach all organs in the body through the blood and lymph nodes and cause major health problems. The Paracelsus Clinic has precise methods for finding and treating all types of jaw cavitation with great success and few complications.

According to my dentist at the clinic, Dr. Gunnar Reifert, all types of metals in the mouth can cause health problems in the long term. One of the reasons is galvanic current that occurs between two different metals in the mouth. This arises due to the constant production of saliva, which creates an atmosphere that contains enough salt to generate electrical power between two metals.

Galvanic currents can also occur with only one type of metal in the mouth, such as gold or amalgam, which is in contact with two electrolytes at the same time as the liquid soft tissue in the tooth and saliva. Oral galvanic current can cause major negative effects in the body, especially in the central nervous system and the brain.

Diagnosis of galvanic current is simple. A dentist can easily measure this with a sensitive current meter. At the Paracelsus Clinic, all patients with metal in the mouth are checked for galvanic current. It is recommended that this is treated for patients with chronic and severe illnesses, as well as for the prevention of disease. This is done by removing all metal from the mouth and replacing it with ceramic (zirconia).

Amalgam fillings

Amalgam contains approximately 50 percent mercury. This is a neurotoxin that can be one of the main causes of illness.

The Paracelsus Clinic removes the amalgam in addition to all the mercury and other toxic metals that have accumulated in the body over time.

Removal of amalgam takes place under extensive protection of both the patient and the dentist.

My experience

The only thing I feared during my stay at the clinic was that they would find bigger problems with my dental health. I have had an intense fear of dentists from when I was a child up until when I was almost 40 years old. For more than 20 years, I was afraid to visit any dentist until I found the key to getting over my fear in an efficient way. Even now, however, I cannot say that I have the longing for either the smell of the dental office or a dental chair.

On my first day of treatment, the dental department took a digital panoramic x-ray image (OPG-orthopedic tomography) of my teeth, gums, and jaws. With these pictures, it is easy for a competent dentist to find diseases related to the teeth, gums, or jawbone. In addition, I went through a series of tests to look for infections, cavitations, galvanic currents, and more.

Even the blood tests showed that I had problems related to my jaw and teeth. Among other things, they found a high value of Rantes Chemokine, which is a protein encoded by the CCL5 gene. This protein plays a role in activating leukocytes (T cells), which causes inflammation. Dead tissue in the cavitations of the jaw bone can lead to a high concentration of Rantes in the blood.

The x-ray showed that I had two hidden wisdom teeth in my upper jaw with bacterial infection and toxins (picture above). Blood tests and other biological tests showed the same result. This inflammation was causing a major strain on my body and immune system, and Dr. Rau and Dr. Reifert concluded that my wisdom teeth had to be removed. They estimated that this was probably one of the main reasons behind my chronically poor health condition.

The surgery

​The removal of my wisdom teeth was a tricky affair, because they were only 1–2 millimeters from my sinuses. If, by accident, any holes should form in the very thin membrane between the wisdom teeth and the sinuses, they could cause major problems, since the bacteria from the mouth can leak to the sinuses and infect them. But fortunately, the clinic has a special procedure, in the worst case, for sealing such holes.

Dr. Reifert explained that the immune system needing strengthening before surgery so that the body could handle any minor infections optimally. Over the next few days, they put me on an intensive treatment of intravenous infusion of high doses of vitamin C and other vitamins and minerals before the operation.

The first surgery was a success. After less than an hour, the tooth was out and the membrane protecting the sinuses were fortunately intact. The hole was cleansed for bacteria. Ozone gas was also used to effectively disinfect the wound.

Activating the body's immune system

Before the procedure, I was tapped for five tubes of blood that were centrifuged while the surgery was running. A particular part of the plasma was then used to fill the hole after the tooth was removed to prevent infection and to enhance cellular generation, as well as for the reconstruction of soft tissue and bone.

This process is called Platelet-Released Growth Factor Therapy (PRGFT). It is a great method for activating the body's immune system; making new blood vessels; increasing the healing rate of wounds, connective tissue, cartilage, and hard bone; improving cellular generation; relieving pain; and stopping bacterial infection.

"PRGFT is also used for osteoarthritis in joints with very good results. The method is also effective in cosmetic treatment of wrinkles, scars and for tightening of skin, and is much better than Botox, and it is without side effects," said Dr. Rau.

According to Dr. Reifert, they almost never have problems with infections or pain after oral intervention, thanks to this method. The clinic generally never uses antibiotics.

Result

A week later, the second wisdom tooth was removed without complications. After each surgery, I received various types of supplements, herbs, and homeopathic remedies to prevent complications, as well as for pain relief. It was amazing that I almost had no swelling or pain. After 3–4 days, everything was normal again, and the post-check showed positive results with no infections or other problems noted.

I am extremely pleased with the high standards and excellent level of competence at the dental department of the Paracelsus Clinic. Dr. Gunnar Reifert is the best and most qualified dentist I have ever met, and I can warmly recommend him and the dental clinic!

They are used to dealing with the most difficult cases, those of which other dentists have given up on or misrepresented. I think it is important that the clinic sees dental health as a very important factor for good health and for the healing of severe and chronic diseases.

How to find your competent dentist

If you are ill or just want to prevent disease, my advice is that you make dental health your first priority. However, it could be difficult to find a competent dentist who performs biological dental treatment like experienced at the Paracelsus Clinic.

Here are some tips to find your dentist:

• Is your dental health evaluated in relation to the rest of your health situation?
• Does the dentist take a panoramic x-ray of your teeth, gums, and jaws, or a 3D image of the jaw?
• Does the dentist measure galvanic current?
• How does the dentist diagnose and treat jaw cavitations?
• How does the dentist diagnose other hidden infections?
• Does the dentist test the materials in fillings and implants to check if they are compatible with your body?
• Does the dentist use metals or ceramics?
• Does the dentist use professional protective equipment while removing amalgam?
• Does the dentist use antibiotics and other standard drugs, or does he or she use the same methods as carried out at the Paracelsus Clinic?


I would be skeptical of dentists that:

• Say there is no medical research concluding that amalgam can lead to health problems.
• Say they do not have any doubts about performing root canal fillings.
• Only take an x-ray of a couple of teeth before making a diagnosis.
• Does not use professional protective equipment during amalgam removal or does not have a detoxification program for the patient after removal.
• Treats jaw bone cavitations without being qualified for the task (which unfortunately can cause major problems for the patient afterward).

Further education of dentists

The Paracelsus Dental Clinic offers courses for further education of dentists in the field of biological dental treatment. In addition, they offer internships with one of the clinic's dentists, so that dentists can learn how they treat patients in a practical way. In addition, the clinic offers education for professionals at the Paracelsus Academy.

Relief

I'm glad that one of the main causes of my health problems was finally diagnosed and treated in a professional and competent manner. The sad thing is that it took many dentists and 15 years to achieve.

The first major step has been completed, and I look forward to sharing the next part of my story and experience with the Paracelsus Clinic in the next article. There, you will find out about the unique way the clinic diagnoses complex diseases and how they figure out exactly what is wrong with the patient.

Article series about Swiss Biological Medicine and Dr. Thomas Rau

GET FREE ACCESS!

Paul E. Wanvig is a Neoteric Shaman, entrepreneur, journalist, author, speaker, bio-hacker, spiritual teacher & encouraging optimist dedicated to helping you and your family live a Fulfilled Life and ending the stress and burnout epidemic by Utilizing the Best of Modern and Ancient Scientific Practices, Medicine and Technology.

Sign up to get VIP access to his upcoming eBooks, online video trainings and valuable weekly health tips for FREE!

Holistic diagnosis and treatment of complex and chronic diseases

Holistic diagnosis and treatment of complex and chronic diseases

How Dr. Thomas Rau M.D, the founder of Swiss Biological Medicine diagnosed and treated me. 

Written by: Paul E. Wanvig, published in English: 4. April 2019

First published in Medium Magazine (Norway) 03.2018

Having consulted numerous doctors across various fields of medicine, I was left frustrated time after time, as none of them could tell me why I felt chronically ill. I visited over 200 physicians, and quite often their expert opinion was that "We find nothing wrong with you, Mr. Wanvig," or "You must learn to live with your disease." Who was I to argue with professionals that had an astonishing array of qualifications displaced on their walls? Needless to say, even I, a highly optimistic person, was very discouraged. But 15 years into my quest, I finally came across the answer.

In Part 1 of this article series, "One of the biggest downturns in my life", I shared the background of my health situation and how I ended up in Dr. Thomas Rau's clinic in Switzerland. In Part 2, "Serious illness can originate from the teeth", I shared my experience with the holistic dental department of the clinic. In this article, I share my experiences with how Dr. Rau diagnoses and treats patients.


Interview #2 with Dr. Thomas Rau

​Topic: Holistic diagnosis of complex and chronic diseases

Here are some highlights of the interview:

  • Holistic diagnosis of complex and chronic diseases
  • Review of my own test results and why I have been very ill for so many years.

More interviews with Dr. Rau

You can see all the exciting interviews I did with Dr. Thomas Rau here.

The art of making the right diagnosis

Without proper diagnosis, it is nearly impossible to treat illness properly. It's like fiddling in the dark and hoping that maybe one of the medicines and treatment methods will at least help with some of the symptoms.

"It helps little with all the blood tests in the world if the doctor is unable to look for and test the correct parameters with the right type of blood tests," said Dr. Thomas Rau. "One of the main problems with doctors in orthodox school medicine is that they are not trained to look at the right places, especially when it comes to chronic illness," he continued.

This explained why the first two days at the clinic were used for extensive diagnosis with methods from both Western school medicine and biological medicine that I had never heard of before, to find the causes of my chronic disease condition: ECG; EEG; ultrasound examinations; measurement of values for xenohormones (chemicals that mimic the hormones in the body); checking for a variety of viruses, sub-clinical infections, and heavy metal poisoning; measurement of the state of the autonomic nervous system; thermography; and more.

Over 40 tubes of blood resulted in approximately 470 different blood values and parameters. About 80 of these were slightly outside of normal levels, while around 30 of them were quite far away from normal values. Based on this, the clinic could diagnose and explain the causes of my illness. A treatment plan was then drawn up to cure the causes of the disease, so that I could finally recover!


Above you will find the second video interview I did with Dr. Rau where he explains some of my test results and the reasons why I was ill.

Treatment methods

According to Dr. Rau, one of the main reasons behind the Paracelsus Clinic's good results is a multimodal treatment form, where they use many different therapies in parallel based on the diagnosis. Here is an overview of some of the treatment modalities they combine to treat cancer, chronic illnesses, and cases like mine—chronic fatigue.

Below you will also find the third video interview I did with Dr. Rau in which he tells about the different therapies used in the clinic.

Interview #3 with Dr. Thomas Rau

Topic: Holistic treatment of complex and chronic diseases

Here are some highlights of the interview:

  • How Dr. Thomas Rau treat complex and chronic diseases with Swiss Biological Medicine
  • Systemic hyperthermia
  • Local hyperthermia
  • life cell extract
  • PRGFT therapy
  • Neurotherapy
  • Oxygen and ozone therapy
  • PEMF - Pulsed electromagnetic field therapy
  • Intravenous infusion therapy
  • and more..

More interviews with Dr. Rau

You can see all the exciting interviews I did with Dr. Thomas Rau here.

Hyperthermia heat treatment

Hyperthermia means to increase the body temperature well above normal. During hyperthermia treatment, all or part of the patient's body is heated to induce a fever. There are essentially two types of hyperthermia, and these methods work in completely different ways:

1. Systemic hyperthermia: The entire body is heated to 38.5–41 degrees Celsius (101–106 degrees Fahrenheit) in a special heater chamber (Heckel heat chamber) or using a special hot bed (Iratherm).

2. Local hyperthermia: Local areas of the body, such as the liver, breast, or prostate are heated up to 42–44 degrees Celsius (107–111 degrees Fahrenheit).

Fever is one of the body's healing reactions that activates the white blood cells. For each degree Celsius the body temperature increases above normal, the activity of the white blood cells is intensified by 2–3 times. Increasing body temperature from 36–39 degrees Celsius increases the activity of the immune system and the white blood cells by 8–10 times. 

Iratherm

Iratherm hyperthermia bed

In case of fever, the white blood cells become activated in the bone marrow and flow into the bloodstream. The T-lymphocytes attack other viruses and detect cancer cells. Macrophages eat and digest foreign substances, cancer cells, microbes, and cells that are sick or dead.

Fever also activates the body's metabolism and circulation, which results in sweating and detoxification, and the body's cellular activity is increased. One of the unique results with hyperthermia and fever is that sick cells die while healthy ones survive. Since cancer cells cannot live at high temperatures, proper use of hyperthermia as a form of treatment is a very effective method for treating multiple cancers.

Systemic hyperthermia is well documented in medical literature (see PubMed.gov), and there is a lot of evidence confirming that induced fever activates cytokines (signal molecules that help control the immune system and fight disease), interferons (mobilization of the body's defense mechanisms), and activation of white blood cells.

Heckel heat chamber

Local hyperthermia works in a completely different way from systemic. In this method, only a limited area of the body is heated to 42–44 degrees Celsius. Cancer cells become apoptotic—they simply commit "suicide"—at a temperature of approximately 42 degrees.

Fresh cells, especially white blood cells, are also activated in the heated area and can survive up to 44 degrees. Paracelsus clinics heat up to 42 degrees Celsius using different techniques and devices that accurately measure the internal temperature in the area that is heated.

The devices operate by using short waves or by pushing ions into the tissue that increase the temperature in the cancerous tissue. With this equipment, the clinic can treat major cancer nodes, like lung cancer, or treat extremely small areas, like lymph nodes.

Both systemic and local hyperthermia are also used against chronic fatigue and weak immune systems, as in my case, and against autoimmune diseases such as ulcerative colitis and psoriasis. Both methods are also used for patients with unclear symptoms like seen in fatigue syndrome, all with very good results.

i-Therm local hyperthermia

Life Cell Extract

The clinic has, in collaboration with German biochemists and biologists, developed a method for separating and concentrating growth factors and cell peptides that can be injected intramuscularly, without side effects, to stimulate patient cells to function better and rebuild cells. The method is called Organ Cell Peptide Extracts.

The clinic separates cells from 16 different organs of young organic pigs, which have a DNA that is almost like that of human DNA, so that the treatment can be applied directly to the affected area.

This treatment method works well on neurological diseases, liver disease, myeloma bone marrow deficiency, adrenal dysfunction, chronic fatigue, and more. According to Dr. Rau, this is a more effective method than stem cell treatment and is both safer and less expensive.

See the video above for more details about this treatment method.

Organ Cell Peptide Extracts

PRGFT therapy


PRGFT (Platelet Released Growth Factors) therapy is an effective method for the natural regeneration of bone, cartilage, connective tissue and skin, as well as to activate the immune system in the area where it is applied. This method was used on me during my two rounds of dental surgery, during which two hidden wisdom teeth were removed.

After surgery, the dentist injected PRGF into the wounds and closed them. This meant that I had no pain, swollen mouth, nor inflammation. The result of this method is that 99.7 percent of patients do not get infections or inflammations after dental surgery, thanks to this unique and simple method. That is why the clinic rarely needs to use antibiotics.

Preparing PRGFT (Platelet Released Growth Factors) 

PRGFT is made by tapping the patient for 4–5 tubes of blood, which is centrifuged to separate the plasma from the red blood cells. The middle third of the plasma in the tubes is mixed with a coagulant so that the plasma becomes like jelly, which is then injected into the open wound. The wound in the jawbone usually heals within 2–3 weeks.

This method is also used for skin diseases and as an effective alternative to Botox to remove wrinkles. The advantage is that "it works better than Botox and is without side effects," said Dr. Rau.

PRGFT (Platelet Released Growth Factors) 

Neural therapy

Neural therapy is a German technique developed by the Huneke Brothers. The technique is a combination of stimulation of nerves and special acupuncture points by injection of procaine or lidocaine together with a mixture of isopathic and homeopathic agents.

The method may be effective in stimulating self-regulation of the body's various systems and organs to cure the causes of a particular disease.


Oxygen and ozone therapy

Healthy cells need oxygen to produce energy. Cancer cells do not have the capacity to use oxygen to create this energy. When cancer patients, old and weak patients, or patients with chronic fatigue receive pure oxygen, old and diseased cells get the opportunity to rebuild themselves and become healthy again.

To add oxygen to the cells, the clinic uses methods such as inhalation of pure oxygen, inhalation of ionized oxygen, intravenous injection of pure oxygen in the blood (Oxyven), ozone, or IHHT (Interval Hypoxia-Hyperoxia Training), during which the patient breathes in different types of air with high and low oxygen levels.

IHHT (Interval Hypoxia-Hyperoxia Training)

PEMF

PEMF (pulsed electromagnetic field) therapy uses electromagnetic fields that stimulate cells and organs with ions to activate the ability of cell membranes to nourish cells and remove waste from the cells.

When cells are exposed to low frequency electromagnetic pulses (5–50 Hz) they begin to vibrate, which increases the electrical potential between the inside and outside of the cell membrane.

A healthy cell has an electrical potential of approximately 70 mV, which ensures that the cell's metabolism works. An ill cell has a much lower potential. Through the use of PEMF, you can help the healing processes in organs and tissues, and the method can be effective for killing cancer cells.

The clinic uses various types of PEMF machines as part of their treatment program for cancer, chronic fatigue, neurological diseases, and other pains.

PEMF (pulsed electromagnetic field) after my dental surgery

Intravenous infusion therapy

Vitamins, minerals, trace elements, amino acids, and isopathic and homeopathic agents are administered intravenously daily to shorten the time patients need to get healthy. 

Each patient receives a tailor-made mix of remedies, based on the diagnosis results.

In addition to the treatment methods discussed here, the clinic also uses several other treatments to help its seriously ill patients. 

In the next article, I will share how to find inner balance in your life through the art of self-regulation.

GET FREE ACCESS!

Paul E. Wanvig is a Neoteric Shaman, entrepreneur, journalist, author, speaker, bio-hacker, spiritual teacher & encouraging optimist dedicated to helping you and your family live a Fulfilled Life and ending the stress and burnout epidemic by Utilizing the Best of Modern and Ancient Scientific Practices, Medicine and Technology.

Sign up to get VIP access to his upcoming eBooks, online video trainings and valuable weekly health tips for FREE!

Find inner balance in your life through the art of self-regulation

Find inner balance in your life through the art of self-regulation

The sound of the heart—your soul's music

Written by: Paul E. Wanvig, published in English: 4. April 2019

First published in Medium Magazine (Norway) 04.2018

One of the most exciting areas of personality development is the topic of self-regulation—the art of consciously regulating our own thoughts, feelings, behaviors, actions, and motivations, as well as our physiological and biological health.

Engaging wholeheartedly in the art of consciously regulating yourself everyday can ease the path toward creating a life filled with meaning, joy, and better health, while improving the results achieved in life. This is one of the most important areas in which we can engage in order to make the most out of life.


Our body's control center

The autonomic nervous system (ANS), also called the vegetative nervous system, is part of our peripheral nervous system that controls the functions of all internal organs and regulates body functions, such as body temperature, heart rate, breathing rate, digestion, saliva secretion, blood pressure, urination, sexual excitement, and the expansion and contraction of pupils.

ANS consists of two parts:
The sympathetic nervous system (SNS) controls the stimulation of the 'fight or flight' stress response. We rely on this for important tasks such as getting out of bed in the morning, running, fighting, or escaping danger.

The parasympathetic nervous system (PSNS) controls the stimulation of resting and digestive activities and is essential for the body's ability to regenerate and heal itself.

The ANS is the body's control center that is responsible for total control and regulation of organs and organ systems. All organs beyond our conscious control are ANS's responsibility. To put it simply: ANS is responsible for regulating all vital functions in the body. Without it, the organs cannot function optimally, which in turn leads to disease.

Diseases created by imbalance

ANS keeps the body's biological systems in balance. If the ANS should fail or underperform over a period of time, the following symptoms and illnesses may occur:

  • Problems with heart rate, blood pressure, body temperature, sweating, and bowel and bladder function
  • Chronic fatigue, dizziness, weakness, and cognitive impairment
  • Depression, sleep disturbances, headaches, migraines, back pain, bacterial and viral diseases, irritable bowel syndrome, peptic ulcers, fertility problems, and menstrual diseases
  • All forms of chronic and degenerative diseases

Early in my treatment at the Paracelsus Clinic, I was sent to their specialist who helps patients find peace of mind and achieve a better physical balance of the autonomic nervous system.

Michael Falkner is educated in psycho-oncology (psychological, behavioral, social, and ethical aspects of cancer) and has more than 17 years of experience in testing and treating more than 10,000 patients at the Paracelsus Clinic.

"Without the body being able to regulate itself in a healthy way and create an inner balance between all biological functions, cells, nervous system, and organs, it is very difficult for it to cure itself no matter how effective are the treatment methods being used. This is why all patients at the clinic are being sent to me as an important part of their treatment plan," explained Michael Falkner.

The meditation teacher who got surprised

Falkner connected me to a heart rate monitor that was connected to his PC that ran software developed by him and his team. The system measured the condition of my autonomic nervous system, how much stress I had, and to what extent I was able to achieve balance in my ANS.

"Are you used to meditation?" he asked.
"I have been a meditation teacher for more than 15 years," I replied.

"Okay, meditate for a few minutes, so we can see how this affects your autonomic nervous system," he added.

After a few minutes I looked at the screen, which showed a half-circle diagram that was mostly filled with red.

"The red shows the stressed part of the autonomic nervous system that does not settle," he explained (Figure 1).

Figure 1

I meditated and felt a peaceful, balanced inner state, with minimal mental distractions. Earlier, I had measured the effect of my meditation on my Mac for several years with other software and had great results in improving my heart rate variability. But despite my best efforts, my ANS refused to calm down.

"Why doesn't it seem to be working now?" I asked.

Falkner had seen this reaction many times—even from a Buddhist monk who was a specialist in meditation for decades—and explained that there isn’t necessarily a link between meditating to find peace of mind and the type of meditation that affects physiology and the ANS.

"You can fill your heart with gratitude, love, peace, and balance without having any direct impact on the part of the nervous system that needs to be in balance for the body's healing powers to function optimally," he explained.

When he instructed me to do a deep breathing exercise, the chart on the PC screen changed after a few seconds so the stress (red) almost disappeared, and most of the chart turned blue, which showed that I was in balance (Figure 2).

Figure 2

Proper breathing is the key to optimal self-regulation of the ANS. The Yogis in India have claimed this for thousands of years. Falkner explained that proper breathing leads to good health, and improper breathing leads to disease.

The main problem

Chronic inner stress is one of the main problems when ANS is not balanced. This means that the sympathetic (stressed) part of ANS is hyperactive even when we rest or sleep. Normally, the parasympathetic (calming down and regeneration) should be most active then. When the sympathetic (stressed) part of ANS is active around the clock, it means that the body's regenerating, self-healing mechanisms and functions suffer.

Finding the condition of the ANS can be done easily by measuring the heart rate variability (HRV) of the patient over 24 hours. Your heart variability is how the time between the heartbeats varies (RR variability). The higher the variation, the better your heart and nervous system are functioning.

The most well-known measurement method of HRV is ECG. When a physician takes an ECG and the variability between heartbeats is minimal, it could be a sign of serious heart problems. With healthy HRV, the distance in milliseconds between heartbeats varies widely.

There are a variety of different software with variable quality available to everyone that measures HRV. The most popular one is made by HeartMath. Michael Falkner and his team has developed their own software (Herzklang), because none of the solutions on the market could be used by the clinic to deliver the desired results with their ill patients.

Measurement of ANS

The Paracelsus Clinic uses different methods for HRV measurement. In one of the test i was lying down on a bench for 10-minutes during the measurement with a sensor attached to my finger. The red post represents the sympathetic (stressed) part of ANS, and the blue represents the parasympathetic. This showed that I had too much stress activity in ANS and too little regenerative activity (Figure 3).

Figure 3 - 10 minutes HRV


I was also went trough a 24-hour HRV measurement for which two measuring sensors was attached near my heart. The top blue curve in figure 4 shows the pulse.

The middle field represents activity in the parasympathetic part of ANS, which should have been much stronger in the deepest parts of my sleep cycle. From the picture, you can see that the quality of deep sleep is not good.

The bottom part of the picture shows that the sympathetic part (in red/orange color) of ANS is also active during sleep, which is not optimal. The picture shows a chronic stressed (sympathetic) state of ANS that prevents the body's ability to self-heal and regenerate.

Figure 4 - 24 hour HRV


 Thermography is another method the clinic used for measuring the state of the ANS indirectly, where the temperature of the body is measured at approximately 130 different places, twice. 

The first measurement is taken after the patient undresses, and the second is done after the patient has spent ten minutes in a cool room.

In my test, the red areas show that I had the same temperature in both measurements, which means my body was not able to regulate itself in a normal way, indicating that the ANS was in chronic imbalance (Figure 5).

Figure 5 - Thermography

The Soul's music

Paracelsus Clinic started using the HeartMath software for measuring HRV over 17 years ago, but the system didn't cover the clinic's needs. They wanted a direct visual approach to the condition of ANS that was divided into sympathetic, parasympathetic, and balanced part. They needed a method that the patients themselves could use to train on balancing ANS even when they were at home.

Michael Falkner and his team spent many years developing the software 'Herzklang,' which is currently being used at the clinic. With it, patients can measure how well they are able to balance their ANS on a daily basis. In addition, Falkner and his team have developed a unique method of presenting HRV as music through spectral frequency and time analysis. The music that comes out is your own unique music. And since the heart is in close contact with your soul and essence, and Falkner calls this "the soul's music".

The music is created by recording HRV for ten minutes while you are meditating, so that most of the chart on the PC screen shows blue (balance). This is done by breathing at a unique individual rate that your body needs, so that ANS balances. The software shows when to breathe in and out, which is unique to every individual, to learn what type of breathing your body needs. The recording is analyzed and processed by Falkner and his team, who make your unique heartbeat music—your soul's music.

What can you do yourself?

There is much you can do yourself to help put your ANS back in balance. I have divided this into three areas: physical, psychological and spiritual self-regulation.

We all know what it's like to shower in water that is too cold or too hot. We regulate the temperature until it is appropriate. We experience the same thing when eating too much or too little, driving too fast or too slow, or exercising too hard. The better we are able to regulate our activities, the greater the balance and the better results we achieve.

Self-regulation is the art of consciously regulating yourself physically, psychologically, and spiritually.

Physical self-regulation

The body is a unique biological machine with its ability to maintain its functions and processes in healthy balance (homeostasis), even in extreme conditions. Here are some factors that help the ANS stay in balance:

  • Enough rest
  • Proper breathing technique
  • Enough quality sleep (at least 7–8 hours per night)
  • Enough physical activity (at least 20 minutes of brisk walking a day)
  • Avoid allergens that unnecessarily trigger the immune system, such as gluten, products made from cow milk, soy, FODMAP products, and other foods you have intolerance to
  • Healthy diet - low carbohydrates, high levels of healthy fat, and a balanced amount of protein


Each factor that is ignored may over time lead to imbalance that prevents the body from regenerating and healing itself, which in turn leads to disease.

Psychological/mental self-regulation

Each time you get stressed unnecessarily or get out of emotional balance by being aggressive, frustrated, angry, depressed, and the like, you trigger the sympathetic part of ANS.

One highly effective method for dealing with negative emotional and mental stress is called 'interruption management.' I have covered this in detail in my book "Beyond Positive Psychology – A Journey from Burnout to Enlightenment."

Hara and diaphragm breathing meditation is one of the easiest and most effective meditations you can do, and it only takes a few minutes to learn. This method stimulates the body's relaxation response by calming the sympathetic part of the ANS and activating the parasympathetic part.

Deep breathing is the only direct access we have to the ANS. Reduction of physical and mental stress stimulates the balance, which may have a positive effect on high blood pressure, pain, headache, various stomach problems, depression, and anxiety, and can improve concentration, oxygen supply, sleep quality, and lung capacity among other things. The problem is that we mostly take short breaths, which focuses the breathing in the upper part of the chest, which then activates the sympathetic part of ANS.

The hara is the largest and most important energy organ that organizes, balances, and stores life energy (Ki) for the entire body. This is extremely important for centering, balance, and grounding.

A practical exercise: Hara and diaphragm breathing meditation

Here is a short explanation of the meditation:

Part 1:

  1. You can sit, lie, stand, or walk. This meditation can be performed anywhere.
  2. Place one hand on the lower part of the stomach and the other on the upper part of the stomach.
  3. Focus your attention on the hara (about two finger widths below the navel), where the lower hand rests, and slowly breathe in for 5 seconds so that both hands move outward.
  4. When your stomach is filled with air, exhale slowly until your stomach is flat while keeping your attention focused on your hara. Both hands move inward. The deeper you are able to breathe in, the better your benefits will likely be from this mediation.
  5. Repeat steps 3 and 4 for a minute or two until you feel centered and relaxed.


Part 2 is a conscious interaction with the thoughts that come up during the meditation and are done together with Part 1.

Part 2:

  1. When a thought occurs in your mind, you welcome it and then pass it on its way.
  2. Focus on the place where the lower hand touches the stomach.
    3. Continue with proper breath.
  3. Repeat 1, 2, and 3 when a new thought comes.


In the beginning, you may experience many thoughts, but as you recognize your thoughts and pass them on, there will be less of them. During 2–3 weeks of 5–10 minutes effort per day, many will experience improvement and exciting results with this simple method, especially if you also use interruption management in your everyday life.

Spiritual self-regulation

The last area of self-regulation has to do with the heart. This is in direct resonance with our essence - the soul. The more motivated you are by the heart's primary emotions like happiness, passion, love, courage, empathy, consideration, and compassion, the closer you will be to your essence.

The problem is that we are often motivated and driven by secondary feelings like fear, anger, hate, frustration, jealousy, greed, fear, fear of competition, and worries.

The art is to learn how to regulate ourselves so that we live out of primary emotions in our daily lives, and the motivation behind our thoughts, behaviors, and actions, is governed by the qualities of the heart. This is something everyone can learn, which will have a positive impact on the ANS and everyday life.

In The 7 Golden Keys For Creating a Conscious, Enlightened Mind covered in my book Beyond Positive Psychology - A Journey from Burnout to Enlightenment you'll find all the tools and insights you need to master the art of consciously regulating yourself physically, psychologically, and spiritually for creating a happy and fulfilled life.

Article series about Swiss Biological Medicine and Dr. Thomas Rau

GET FREE ACCESS!

Paul E. Wanvig is a Neoteric Shaman, entrepreneur, journalist, author, speaker, bio-hacker, spiritual teacher & encouraging optimist dedicated to helping you and your family live a Fulfilled Life and ending the stress and burnout epidemic by Utilizing the Best of Modern and Ancient Scientific Practices, Medicine and Technology.

Sign up to get VIP access to his upcoming eBooks, online video trainings and valuable weekly health tips for FREE!

Do you struggle with perfectionism? Learn why you never can be perfect—and how to avoid the chase!

Do you struggle with perfectionism?

Learn why you never can be perfect—and how to avoid the chase!

Written by: Paul E. Wanvig, published in English: 3. April 2019

First published in Medium Magazine (Norway) 02.2015

Why is it impossible for human beings to be perfect and what are the consequences of this vain pursuit? Perfectionism has become one of today's major public diseases—"everything and everyone must be perfect!" In this article, you will find tips on how to let go of the perfectionist in you and how this will benefit all aspects of your life.


Once upon a time, I was proud to be a perfectionist. That was part of my identity. Everything had to be 100 percent. I strived continuously for things to get better, and even the greatest success was not good enough since everything could be even better. It was never enough. In December 2003, after suffering from burnout, I had a brutal awakening and finally realized what life is truly about.

Glamorizing perfectionism

Society often glamorizes perfectionism. We want to have a perfect body, and not only that, but also a perfect house, car, family, and job. Jobs and income often define social status. The higher and faster we climb the career ladder, the more valuable and "perfect" we are in the eyes of society.

We live in a world where our own and others' expectations cause us to often only exist. We rush from one thing to the other while we continuously respond to what's happening on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter. The boss pushes us to work overtime, the family requires us to be present, friends get upset that we do not have time for them, and sometimes we must also find time to shop, cook, and wash, as well as drop and pick up our children from school. The pursuit of perfectionism can suck the life out of anyone.

All of this is supported by the media as well as a giant self-help industry with countless seminars and books that provide us with tools and insights to "help" us become even more perfect...

I love being a fallible human—it means I accept my basic nature.

- Paul E. Wanvig

Impossible standards

The paradox is that perfectionism in itself is a mirage—a castle in the air. Striving for perfectionism is striving for the impossible. What is perfect? How do we measure it? What does it look like?

For example, and most authors will recognize this dilemma well: The goal of writing the perfect book is probably the main reason why most drafted books are never published. There is no book that is perfect. Even after several rounds of edits and revisions, typing and grammatical errors are always found, and all content, of course, can be written better...

The first article I wrote for Medium magazine in Norway was published in 2009 and had the title "From disease and desperation to health and happiness." It took me over four weeks to write it. When I read it today, I'm not exactly proud of the content or language of the article. Today it takes me 3–4 hours to write an article like the one you are reading now. The big difference is that I have now realized what perfectionism really is and how to avoid suffering from it, which in turn has led to a comprehensive improvement in my quality of life. (I also, of course, have much more experience in writing).

To strive for the irrational goal of perfectionism makes many people frustrated, stressed, sick, and unhappy. This is probably the most serious disease we have in our society today, since it robs us of opportunities to become happier. The pursuit of perfectionism leads to chronic negative stress, which in turn can lead to both physical diseases, such as cardiovascular disease, and mental illnesses, such as depression and anxiety (i.e., see References 1, 2, 3, and 4).

The depression epidemic

Another paradox is that the use of antidepressants has increased over the past two decades, while in the West we live in the most successful and richest time period in history! Use of antidepressants among Americans has increased by 400 percent since the early 1990s (Ref. 7). According to the Journal of the American Medical Association (JAMA), 13 percent of the American population used antidepressants in 2012, while 6.8 percent used them in 1999. Usage has almost doubled in a decade (Ref. 8). Even though we are richer than ever, we are unhappier than ever in modern history!

Karōshi—death after overworking

Japan is one of the most extreme work and perfectionist cultures in the world. As far as I know, Japan was the first culture in the world to have its own word for "death from overworking": karōshi. China has borrowed the term and calls it guolaosi (guò láo sǐ). To be considered a karōshi, the victims must have worked more than 100 hours of overtime the month before they died or 80 hours overtime for two consecutive months during the last six months before their death (Ref. 5). Typical causes of death in karōshi are heart attacks, strokes, and suicides.

In Japan, it is normal and expected that you are going to give everything to your job. A typical work week for the Japanese is often 60–90 hours. In this culture, there isn't much balance between work and leisure. For example, 70 percent of men and 60 percent of women aged 18–34 do not have romantic partners, of which 42 percent of men and 44 percent of women are virgins (Ref. 6). The government in Japan is concerned that sexual apathy and an astonishingly high number of singles, as well as widespread loneliness in the younger part of the population, will lead to a cultural disaster in the coming years.

But Japan is not unique. Mexico is at the top when it comes to overworking, with the United States right behind. In China, over 600,000 people die every year from overworking (Ref. 5).

Do not fear perfectionism—you will never achieve it.

- Salvador Dalí

The path out of the hamster wheel

Most people I meet are in some way driven by the hunt for perfectionism. It may be a homeowner that wants to create the perfect home and a beautiful exterior facade—and wants to be present for the children, grandchildren, friends, sports teams, and everyone else. But it is not enough that you should be present everywhere; you should also beam with happiness, be in a good mood, and make sure everything goes according to plan always.

The same basic issue often also applies to students, physicians, engineers, business executives, unemployed persons, and retirees. It usually does not matter what you do or who you are—this troll exists anyway as an active "behavioral program" that operates by itself in the subconscious mind.

For my part, the journey out of the "hamster wheel" started after I was involuntarily burned out and had to ask myself if life was really all about working as a perfect machine, so that I could be considered a valuable person according to society standards, or whether it was about living a life where I accept that I am a human being, who by definition is fallible by nature.

I'm not an infallible person

I have never met a person who does not make mistakes—many mistakes! Have you? Irrespectively, most people unfortunately use far too much energy to avoid making mistakes. Afraid to make mistakes at work, afraid to say the wrong things, afraid of failing in the exam, afraid of not being good enough, afraid of not having the right clothes, afraid of asking the wrong question, afraid of getting asked questions about something we cannot answer, afraid of what people want to say, afraid of... and the fear continues indefinitely.

To try avoiding mistakes, we use much energy; the more perfect we can be, the less reason we have for fear of making mistakes. Thus, the infinite sprint in the hamster wheel is underway, put on autopilot by our subconscious behavior.

I have met many who have far above average talent and knowledge in several fields. But talent and knowledge are unfortunately not the most important factors for success. Over the last decade, I have learned from many teachers in the personal development and complementary medicine industries. Everyone has the basics needed to educate others in their field of study, but unfortunately, too many people get stuck in their own performance anxiety.

Imagine if, while I was hosting a seminar, I get asked a question from one of my participants that I cannot answer. What will they think of me then? Since I'm a teacher and expert of my topic, I should know everything, right? This leads to an eternal pursuit for more knowledge: reading more books, going on several courses, acquiring more education—because when I have enough knowledge and am perfect enough, I will start up my business. The problem is that most people will never feel perfect enough, no matter how much knowledge they get.

I want to be perfect—meaning that the basic nature of human beings is nonsense.

- Paul E. Wanvig

I LOVE making mistakes!

The first step out of the perfectionist's hamster wheel is to become aware of it and accept that making mistakes is completely natural and unavoidable. Why are you fighting against your own nature? Why not instead play with it and recognize that making mistakes is good? We are dependent on making mistakes to learn new things, to develop and grow in order to change things in life.

Is it possible to become a skilled tennis player without making thousands of mistakes first? Is it possible to learn to play the piano without first making mistakes? Is it possible to learn anything without making mistakes? Of course not! Mistakes are our greatest teachers. Our mistakes are something valuable that we should love with our whole heart!

Without mistakes, there is no growth or development. The more you try to avoid making mistakes, the more opportunities you take from yourself to grow, to change what you do not like about your life, and to be happier.

The only way I know how to get skilled in a discipline is to throw myself into it after I have learned the basic knowledge. It's only when a person begins to teach students that he or she starts to understand what it's really about being a teacher—through all the mistakes you make, experience and wisdom is what you harvest out of this. It's impossible to become an excellent teacher or therapist by just sitting in the classroom being a student.

Are all mistakes good?

This is an important question to ask in this context. To search or make mistakes for the sake of it will only lead you into another hamster wheel. The key here is to learn from the mistakes we make and avoid repeating them. The mistakes help us ask the right questions, so we can consciously fill the void (or knowledge gaps) with relevant information and experience. If you make the same mistake over and over again, this means you do not want to learn the lesson it has to teach, which then only creates more frustration.

If you are looking for perfection, you will never be satisfied.

- Leo Tolstoy

The solution

Here are some tips to get you out of your perfectionist hamster wheel.

  1. Accept that you are a human who makes mistakes and not an infallible, functioning machine.
  2. Start the day repeating the following mantra in front of the mirror: "I love being a fallible human! I open my arms to the mistakes I'm going to make today—for they are my biggest teachers! I'm curious what my next mistake will be!"
  3. Eighty percent is always good enough; Pareto's principle also applies here to the fullest. He said that we use 20 percent of the resources to achieve 80 percent of the result, and 80 percent of the resources to hunt for the remaining 20 percent. The perfectionist always goes for 100 percent, while the one who has jumped out of the hamster wheel has realized that 80 percent is good enough, since there are so many other worthwhile things in life to use the rest of the resources on.
  4. When you make a mistake, use the "interruption handling technique" to free yourself from suffering the emotional states described in my book "Beyond Positive Psychology A Journey from Burnout to Enlightenment" and self regulation methods described in the article "Find inner balance in your life through the art of self-regulation".  Then find out how to avoid making the same mistake again.

The art of being a human being

It requires courage to allow yourself to be a living person, as opposed to the perfect machine society wants us to be, that only exists. But the prize for this is unbelievably large. Before I had burned out, I was like a functional machine (i.e., the functional achiever described in my book, "Beyond Positive Psychology – A journey from burnout to enlightenment") who thought I was indispensable and had a need to control everything, because I was the only one able to do things well enough. In the days after I went to the ground, I realized that the world went on just as well without me. I saw that I definitely was not indispensable to anyone.

This led to frustration, self-pity, and depression at the start. Eventually, I realized that happiness and meaning never would come to me as long as I defined my own value and my needs from someone other than myself. Before, I lived my life based on society's idea of what life should be and what it should involve. Today, I know that basic and genuine happiness and meaning can only come from knowing what I desire for myself and living to my own satisfaction.

Take, for example, writing this article. I have used the morning to write it, and now it's lunchtime. Could it be better? Of course! I could easily use a week or two to perfect it. Would that give me more meaning and happiness? No! Would it give you drastically higher value to read it? No! Eighty percent is and will be good enough.

The ideas I put forth are for inspiration to create a better life. Now it's up to you if you want to try this out or not. I respect your free will to choose what is right for you.
I choose to use the remaining 80 percent of my resources to live and not try to persuade you or perfect the article. For the rest of the day, I will enjoy life together with my dear wife in our charming garden. The sun is shining, and I rejoice in the life that I'm allowed to live!

References:

1) Life events, stress, and illness. http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3341916

2) Stress and health: Psychological, behavioral, and biological determinants. http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2568977

3) 50 common signs and symptoms of stress. http://www.stress.org/stress-effects

4) Psychology Today: Why stress turns into depression. https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/in-practice/201303/why-stress-turns-depression

5) BBC: Can you work yourself to death? http://www.bbc.com/capital/story/20160912-is-there-such-thing-as-death-from-overwork

6) Washington Post: Japan has a worrying number of virgins, government finds. https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/worldviews/wp/2016/09/16/japan-has-a-worrying-number-of-virgins-government-finds/?utm_term=.e03c546a88d1

7) Center for Disease Control and Prevention. Antidepressant use in persons aged 12 and over: United States, 2005–2008. https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/databriefs/db76.htm

8) Percentage of Americans on antidepressants nearly doubles. http://jama.jamanetwork.com/article.aspx?articleid=2467552#joi150128r28

9) The rise of all-purpose antidepressants. http://www.scientificamerican.com/article/the-rise-of-all-purpose-antidepressants

GET FREE ACCESS!

Paul E. Wanvig is a Neoteric Shaman, entrepreneur, journalist, author, speaker, bio-hacker, spiritual teacher & encouraging optimist dedicated to helping you and your family live a Fulfilled Life and ending the stress and burnout epidemic by Utilizing the Best of Modern and Ancient Scientific Practices, Medicine and Technology.

Sign up to get VIP access to his upcoming eBooks, online video trainings and valuable weekly health tips for FREE!

Recovered from chronic disease with stool!

Recovered from chronic disease with stool!

Ending more than 40 years of pain and suffering after just a few FMT treatments at the Taymount Clinic

Written by: Paul E. Wanvig, published in English: 2. April 2019

First published in Medium Magazine (Norway) 02.2015

Western orthodox school medicine is on the brink of a revolution. Healing of chronic and incurable diseases is closer than ever before. The breakthrough is due in part to a 'nontraditional' approach, which uses human feces as a probiotic, a method that has proven to be very effective.


The world is on the verge of an extraordinary medical revolution that will come through the understanding of our human microbiome—our intestinal bacteria.

- Dr. David Topping, Senior Chief Researcher at CSIRO (a public institution for scientific research in Australia with more than 5,000 employees)



Western school medicine is on the brink of a revolution in the understanding and healing of chronic and incurable diseases, such as Crohn's disease, ulcerative colitis, multiple sclerosis (MS), Parkinson's disease, Alzheimer's disease, autoimmune diseases, and chronic fatigue syndrome (CFS). A somewhat "nontraditional" method using human feces has proven to be a very effective probiotic.

I have visited and received treatment at one of the world's premier clinics that does research on the use of the fecal microbiota transplant (FMT) method. The Taymount Clinic outside of London has performed more than 8000 transplants, which is probably the highest number completed by any clinic or hospital worldwide.

As part of my visit to the clinic, I conducted a video interview with the research director and founder Dr. Glenn Taylor, PhD. You may find this interview below (coming soon).

(Statement: I have no financial benefits from the Taymount Clinic. I paid the full price for my treatment. My enthusiasm for the clinic comes from the results, how they took care of me as a patient, and their groundbreaking method for quality, which assures donors about the production of the implants.)

Interview with Dr. Glenn Taylor, PhD.

I recommend watching the video interview I did during my stay at the Taymount Clinic with Dr. Glenn Taylor, PhD, one of the world's leading FMT authorities, responsible for more than 8,000 FMT treatments so far.

Interview with full transcription (coming soon)

Topic: Fecal microbiota transplant (FMT)

Here are some highlights of the interview:

  • What is the difference between FMT and probiotics?
  • Why did taking thousands of probiotics for years not work?
  • His philosophy and background
  • Security, production, and selection of donors
  • How I inherited a part of my digestive problem from my mother
  • The consequences of antibiotics
  • The danger of using "kitchen mixer" solutions and other do-it-yourself methods
  • Why problems with the digestive system have become a public disease
  • Why proper food is essential for the health and survival of bacteria
  • FMT in the future

A true miracle

Over 40 years of suffering is finally over! In this article, I share my experience of a fascinating method, called fecal microbiota transplant, in which feces are transplanted from a healthy donor to a sick client.

Since I was a child, I have struggled daily with a bloated and painful stomach, diarrhea, constipation, cramps, burping, gassing, and lack of vitality. The commonly diagnosis commonly used for such related problems is called irritable bowel syndrome (IBS).

As a young and active boy, this was a big problem. My state of health was unstable. This was often a problem at school, when exercising and in sports competitions. One day, I would be in top shape, the next I wouldn’t be able to run due to a stomach ache. Medical tests showed that there were no physical problems, so it was concluded that the cause was emotional, and I was using the discomfort as an excuse not to do sports.

This problem persisted during my upbringing and through my active sports career. Later as an adult, I have had bouts of brain fog, poor concentration, and fatigue. These would come and go without any discernible pattern.

Close to giving up

In July 2015, I was in a hospital for three days to undergo tests on my digestive system. I was treated by an expert of internal medicine in Germany. By that point, I was desperate. The first half of that year was an emotional nightmare after Maria and I lost our son, and physiologically I had brain fog and all kinds of digestive problems. I mustered as much strength as I was able to generate to be able to continue my job as a teacher and coach. With intensive pain and limited ability to think and focus clearly, I forced myself to complete my planned seminars and counseling appointments during the first six months of the year.

When summer vacation started, I was a shadow of myself. I was close to collapse again not only physically but also emotionally. Throughout the 12 years after the burnout that had almost killed me in 2003, I had tried everything to cure my chronic digestive problems. Even though I became better for short periods, there was nothing that yielded lasting results. Several hundred thousand dollars were spent on therapies, medications, and supplements that had given minimal results.

“There’s nothing pathologically wrong with you."

The chief physician and his team spent three days on colonoscopy, gastroscopy, biopsy, capsular endoscopy (where a camera capsule is inserted into the body to film the small intestines), ultrasound tests, organ tests, hormone studies, and dozens of blood tests.

"Everything is alright, and there is nothing pathologically wrong with you, Mr. Wanvig," was what the doctor said.

"We did not even find a polyp in your intestine." The chief physician suggested antidepressants and recommended that I seek a psychologist. I was obviously relieved that there was no colon cancer or the like, but the message was also a setback, since they did not find the cause of my disorder.

The emotional shock and stress of losing our child had an effect on my stomach, bowel, and digestion, but I was 100 percent sure that this was not the cause, because I had the same digestive problems regardless of whether I was happy, tired, stressed, or depressed!

But in times of need, even the devil eats flies. I was a hairline away from accepting the suggestion of the physician, even though I knew this was not the solution. I was ready to give up. The spark was about to extinguish, and darkness came over me. Where can I find a solution when I have tried everything?

The lifesaving angel

In the darkest of times, light often comes from unexpected places. This time it came from a book I accidentally downloaded during the hospital stay: Brain Maker, by Dr. David Perlmutter. In this book, which I highly recommend, Dr. Perlmutter describes the relationship between the condition of the intestine flora (microbiota) and the state of the brain. He described all of my symptoms in detail, the reason for them, and a treatment that I knew little about before—fecal microbiota transplantation (FMT).

In his book, he wrote about impressive results with many of his patients that had similar symptoms to mine, and he recommended an FMT clinic in Europe where he sends his patients.

My hope was lit again; the Taymount Clinic in Hitchin was just outside of London, UK, where a treatment performed by Dr. Glenn Taylor and his team would put an end to more than 40 years of pain and suffering after just a few treatments.

Fecal microbiota transplantation

"Fecal" is another word for poop, and I shook my nose as I dived into the science of this surprising but extraordinarily exciting part of our biology. The intestinal microbiome refers to the total population of bacteria in the intestines, consisting of more than 1,000 different bacterial species and over 100 trillion bacteria. This means that you have 1,000 times more bacteria in the intestine than cells in your body (the human body consists of approximately 100 billion cells).

With fecal microbiota transplantation, the microbiomes are transplanted from a healthy donor to the patient using a rectal catheter, colonoscopies, or a probe through the nose to your small intestine.

Food residues, surface tissue, bilirubin (yellow waste), hormones, and toxins are filtered away from the stool of the donor, so that mainly the intestinal bacteria are transferred to the patient. This process is complicated and sensitive, since 99 percent of the bacteria are anaerobic (they do not need oxygen to grow and multiply) and 90 percent of them die as soon as they come into contact with oxygen.

A medical revolution

Research shows that billions of intestinal bacteria affect the state of the immune system, the heart, the brain, the metabolism, and the rest of the body. Your microbiome helps determine if you develop allergies, get diabetes, become overweight, or get asthma. Recent research also shows that intestinal bacteria affects depression, anxiety, autism, Parkinson's, Alzheimer's, MS, CFS, arthritis, irritable bowel syndrome (IBS), and cardiovascular diseases, in addition to chronic inflammatory bowel disease (IBD) like Crohn's disease and ulcerative colitis.

The book, Gut: The Inside Story of Our Body's Most Underrated Organ, by the German physician and researcher Giulia Enders, has helped to popularize the knowledge of the health of the intestine. Her book is the most sold nonfiction book in Germany ever.

Dr. Perlmutter describes in the book Brain Maker how the intestinal flora and intestinal bacteria affect us, especially our brain functions. I highly recommend these books, and they also provide many references to relevant medical research done in this area.

FMT at the Taymount Clinic

The Taymount Clinic (taymount.com) outside London in England is a private, world-leading clinic in research and use of FMT (fecal microbiota transplantation). The clinic was founded in 2003 by Dr. Glenn Taylor and his wife, Dr. Enid Taylor, and is internationally recognized as a specialist center for the testing and production of certified intestinal bacteria (microbiota), implantation techniques and treatment of, for example, C. difficile (Clostridium difficile), a painful infectious disease in the large intestine that can be fatal. As of today, the clinic has 100 percent remission rate with FMT treatment for this serious disease.

The philosophy behind the treatment

FMT treatments normalize the intestinal flora in patients with a number of chronic diseases that originate from adverse bowel flora (dysbiosis). Although they do not market FMT for the treatment of certain diseases due to the legislation in England, they have helped patients with Clostridium difficile and a number of other inflammatory bowel diseases and imbalances created after the use of antibiotics.

The goal is to replace the intestinal flora of an ill patient with intestinal flora from a healthy donor, so that the cause of the disease is cured.

Deciding on a treatment

After Dr. Perlmutter's Brain Maker put me on track toward FMT, I spent several days searching for and reading relevant information and testimonials about the method. Here are the six main categories of information I found:

  1. The authorities are often restrictive of accepting FMT treatment, since there is little published research. In Norway, the legislation is not clarified, but some hospitals offer the method for the treatment of severe Clostridium difficile infections. England and Germany have more flexible legislation.
  2. Physicians and some researchers warn against the use of the method due to the risk of disease transmission and that the treatment may not show results. In other words, antibiotics and allopathic drugs should be used as medicine, not feces.
  3. A number of physicians praise FMT as an extraordinary medical revolution, based on their research findings.
  4. Physicians, clinics and hospitals that offer FMT have comprehensive control and screening processes of the donors to prevent disease transmission, as well as a production process where only pure and healthy intestinal flora from the donor is transferred to the patient.
  5. There are physicians, clinics, and hospitals offering fecal transplant where they transplant the complete feces from a donor, who often is a family member, without filtering, not taking into account that the intestinal bacteria is exposed to oxygen and without quality control (the stool is mixed with saline or milk in a kitchen mixer and put into the client from behind using a tube). *Later we will revisit why many warn against this kind of procedure and find this method irresponsible.
  6. "Do-it-yourself home solutions" involve methods for transplanting stools from a friend or family member to yourself using an enema and a kitchen mixer. *We will discuss more later about why this is playing Russian roulette with your and others’ health.


Two things were most important to me when I was looking for a clinic for my FMT treatment: patient results and safety. We all know how easy it is to get infected through saliva and blood, and it is as easy to get infected when living tissues, body fluids, and bacteria are transferred from a sick donor to a patient.

Security in choosing donors

For me it was important that the donors had gone through a comprehensive screening process to rule out the presence of any disease that could be transmitted to me. In addition, it was obvious to me that the donor lived a healthy life, did not smoke or drink alcohol, ate healthy organic food, was slim, and had an active and healthy lifestyle.

The only clinic I found that met such requirements was the Taymount Clinic. They have a comprehensive protocol and full-time employees who are responsible for selecting and screening donors, which, briefly, consists of the following steps:

  1. A selected donor must be healthy in body and mind, free of mental illness, slim and strong, must not have used antibiotics in recent times, and must be nutritionally conscious with a varied ecological diet to optimize the health and diversity of their intestinal flora. Smokers and those who enjoy alcohol or other drugs are not used as donors.
  2. Those who pass this needle-eye screening process must also pass a comprehensive blood and stool test that is designed to reveal any diseases.
  3. When the donor passes these tests, the feces are harvested through a specially developed method in which the donor delivers the stool in a deoxygenated saline solution, which is immediately treated with nitrogen to sustain the anaerobic bacteria that would otherwise have died when subjected to oxygen.
  4. Then the feces are centrifuged, and all waste products are separated. Once this is done, all that remains is the donor's clean microbiome.
  5. Then, a special and safe anti-freeze protection fluid is supplied to the microbiome, which is stored in a medical ultra-deep freezer at a temperature of -86 degrees Celsius (-123 degrees Fahrenheit) to preserve the quality of the microbiome.
  6. The deep-frozen microbiome is quarantined for a minimum of three months and is not released until the donor has been re-examined with a comprehensive blood and stool test. This ensures that pathogens and diseases that are not possible to detect at an early stage are completed before the microbiome is used. Only when the second test is free from disease, is the microbiome released for use in patients.


This was exactly what I was looking for. I found no other clinic that was close to such quality assurance of the microbiome transplants used on patients.

Today, the Taymount Clinic delivers certified microbiome transplants from its donor bank to clinics and hospitals worldwide. They also have partner clinics in the Bahamas, Canada and Slovakia.

An easy choice

Based on the information I collected, it was easy to choose Taymount Clinic. I booked a free initial consultation with them on their website, so they could find out if I was a suitable patient they could receive.

I ordered the treatment package for 10 FMT treatments, three of which were performed at their clinic outside of London. The remaining seven could be done at home with the help of my wife, since I did not have the opportunity to stay in London for ten days. Usually, an FTM treatment is done daily for ten days, but this may vary from patient to patient depending on their condition and need. I paid about £4000 (in 2015) for the treatment. Additional costs included the flight and then an apartment that we rented through Airbnb.

After paying a deposit of £1000, the clinic's professional team followed up and went through what I had to prepare for before the first treatment. They also informed me of any side effects that could occur during the treatment, such as diarrhea, upset stomach, or feeling unwell. They explained that they could not guarantee any result. Some got results after a few days, while others could take up to two years of treatment before the new intestinal flora helped, and yet others had no results at all. After the patient agreement containing these items was signed and submitted, I was ready for my first treatment.

First treatment

As part of the treatment package, the first day started with a colon hydrotherapy treatment, in which hot water is injected into the rectum to empty all the contents of the large intestine. Contrary to my previous experience with colon hydrotherapy, this was a pleasant treatment done by two highly skilled therapists.

The day after, I received my first FMT treatment. This is a simple and painless procedure that takes less than an hour. First, a thin catheter is inserted into the large intestine rectally, and the fluid containing the donor's microbiome is injected. Then, I received a comfortable massage to distribute the new microbiome throughout the colon, during which I had to sit and lie in several different positions as this was happening.

The Taymount Clinic has perfected this FMT delivery method for optimal results. They have found that this method is more effective and comfortable for the patient than delivering the microbiome via enema, gastroscopic probe, or nasal probe, in which you get a tube through your nose down to the small intestine. The latter method can cause you to throw up feces or, at worst, get feces in the lungs.

After the treatment, I was told to rest calmly until the next treatment the following day. I was exhausted in the evening and slept like a rock.

Waiting for my FMT treatment

Second day of treatment

In the morning I felt something was happening in my intestines. It was a lot of activity, and I felt sensible both physically and emotionally.

Since I had only three days of treatment at the clinic, they started teaching my wife Maria so she could carry out the last seven treatments at home. At first, she shrugged her shoulders, which I understood very well, as this is not an uncommon practice in a loving relationship. "What would I NOT do to help you recover?" was her comment.

The treatment was done completely without discomfort, and afterward we went sightseeing in the city. My energy level was increasing, and I felt more balanced.

The miracle starts

I woke up early in the morning on the third day and prepared for my usual uncontrolled blowout in the toilet bowl. "This is amazing!" I shouted to my half-sleeping wife. "My stomach is flat!" I was so excited. "My stomach is flat! My stomach is flat!" I repeated over and over, as I couldn’t believe what I saw and felt. Maria opened her eyes and confirmed for me that my bowel was not inflated, but she couldn’t fully understand the fuss so early in the morning.

To me, this was the start of the biggest medical miracle I had ever experienced with my own health until then—and the end of more than 40 years of suffering! I had been used to waking up with a painful and cramped, bloated stomach that looked like a fully blown balloon, which forced me to creep to the toilet each morning.

Next surprise came on the toilet. I expected the same explosive routine as always, but for the first time, I felt that things were going normally. Incredible; the treatments worked! I was ecstatic when we arrived at the clinic that morning. “This is incredible! This is amazing!" was the mantra I sang to everyone. The healthy smile of the clinic therapists revealed that this reaction is not unfamiliar to them.

For the next seven days, my dear wife performed the FMT treatment for me at home. I became better and better each day. No gassing, no bloating, no pain, no cramps, and no brain fog. My energy level increased gradually, and at the time of writing (Spring 2016), it has been 9 months since I completed my 10 FMT treatments—and I'm still feeling great!

Every painless day is a miracle, and it's not possible to express my gratitude to Dr. Perlmutter, who put me on track with his book Brain Maker, Dr. Glenn Taylor and his team at the Taymount Clinic that made it possible for me, and my patient wife who is always there for me.

Can I do the FMT treatment at home?

FMT must not be confused with fecal transplant (FT) for which the unfiltered feces are mixed with an isotonic saline solution, milk, or the like in a kitchen mixer and then transplanted to the client anally with a catheter. This procedure is often found on the internet and in self-help books and can be directly harmful to health, the recipient can receive diseases from the donor when the transplanted stool is unfiltered and untested.

Unfortunately, FT is used in some medical clinics and hospitals, sometimes with a broad spectrum of antibiotics to counteract potential diseases spreading. I would never have exposed myself or my loved ones to such an irresponsible treatment that could result in the transmission of serious illness. In addition, 90 percent of the intestinal bacteria die when they are exposed to oxygen in the kitchen mixer.

The Taymount Clinic offers a solution for those who do not have the opportunity to stay in the clinic for ten days. The prerequisite is that you visit the clinic and get at least five treatments (three in my case) and training on how to do this with a partner at home. They do not accept orders of transplants, instructions, or equipment beyond this.

Is this a miracle cure for everything?

No! FMT is a method of recovering a diseased intestinal flora using a donor's intestinal flora. An unbalanced intestinal flora can be contributory cause to multiple diseases. There are many individual factors at play, and Dr. Taylor told me that getting such a comprehensive result as fast as mine is not usual. It may take up to two years with regular treatments before the new intestinal bacteria get a permanent foothold, and some patients notice no improvement at all.

I recommend that you carefully study this treatment and discuss it with your physician before making a decision. 

What do you have to do yourself?

To achieve satisfactory and long-term results with FMT treatment, it is recommended to switch to a bowel- and bacteria-friendly diet and to reduce the intake of all foods that can cause intestinal inflammation.

This means you should practice the following:

  • Gluten-free/restricted diet
  • Diet free from cow milk products (especially A1 beta-casein)
  • Minimal intake of ready-made and junk food
  • Minimal intake of sugar and glucose
  • Consume some protein from meat and fish, since some important bacterial strains need animal protein to survive
  • A varied selection of vegetables
  • Increased intake of organic, good oils, like ghee and coconut oil


The books Gut: The Inside Story of Our Body's Most Underrated Organ by Dr. Giulia Enders and Brain Maker by Dr. Perlmutter, you will find many tips and advice on food for optimal bowel health. My favorite diet, which is fundamental to my nutrition and gives excellent results, is described in The Bulletproof Diet: Lose up to a Pound a Day, Reclaim Energy and Focus, Upgrade Your Life by Dave Asprey.

After Christmas 2015, I was shocked by the negative effects sweets, sugar, and unhealthy carbohydrates had on my intestinal flora. After being completely pain- and symptom-free for three months, I thought that now everything was fine and I deserved to celebrate a little with chocolate and marzipan. Two weeks of "celebration" led to my bowel exploding like a balloon AGAIN, and I was back where I started. It took almost four weeks to recover, and it shocked me how much sweets and high blood sugar levels affect intestinal bacteria. I was lucky that the treatment had not been wasted, as the intestinal bacteria recovered after a few weeks with optimal nutrition.

This is also part of the background for why I recommend that my clients and students wait until they have changed their diet as described here before FMT treatment. Believing that such treatment will work like a magic pill without first turning to a healthier diet and lifestyle can quickly become an expensive experience. If you are willing to pay that much money, it's a good idea to secure your investment with your own efforts.

Experience shows that most of my clients and students who suffer from digestive problems and related side effects become much better when they quit gluten and cow milk dairy products 100 percent, in addition to maintaining a stable blood sugar level, which means no sweets, sodas, soft drinks, and junk food. It seems that as long as the intestinal flora is not completely in imbalance like mine, much can be done to restore balance by giving bacteria the right food and taking care of them with a healthy lifestyle.

Resources

GET FREE ACCESS!

Paul E. Wanvig is a Neoteric Shaman, entrepreneur, journalist, author, speaker, bio-hacker, spiritual teacher & encouraging optimist dedicated to helping you and your family live a Fulfilled Life and ending the stress and burnout epidemic by Utilizing the Best of Modern and Ancient Scientific Practices, Medicine and Technology.

Sign up to get VIP access to his upcoming eBooks, online video trainings and valuable weekly health tips for FREE!

Free Yourself by Forgiving! Learn the 7 pillars of true forgiveness

Free Yourself by Forgiving!

Learn the 7 pillars of true forgiveness

The inability to forgive is probably the main cause of many wars, conflicts, divorces, and an overall lack of joy in life. Our lives and the world at large would probably look very different if we had learned the art of forgiveness in elementary school.

In this article, you will learn how and why absolutely everything can be forgiven, as well as the difference between forgiveness and accepting what has happened. Forgiveness is for your own sake—and it can set you free. My advice is for you to become an expert in forgiveness!

Being unable to forgive costs us a lot of energy in our everyday life. We frustrate ourselves and hate people who hurt us, but are these actions really worth giving others the power over our thoughts, feelings, health, and happiness?

One of the most valuable arts a person can learn on the road to good health, joy, and meaning, is the ability to forgive yourself and others in a complete way. Learning to forgive will set us free! “Does this mean I should accept everything that others have done to me?” Of course not! Let’s take a short but intensive dive into the topic to give you a basic understanding of forgiveness. We will explore the tools and inspiration needed to forgive yourself and others from the depths of your heart.

Success with forgiveness

Forgiveness is something everyone must learn, since most people either aren’t born with this ability and didn’t learn it from their parents or while in school.

Forgiveness that has worked can be evidenced by how you interact with the person afterward on a regular basis (more on this later). Trying to forgive others by using pure willpower and discipline is nearly impossible, since there are often strong emotions involved. Gritting your teeth while trying to ignore the problem does not solve it either and often leads to more stress, irritation, and suffering.

Since there are many misconceptions about forgiveness, we need to set the record straight on what forgiveness really is and what it is not. We need to know why it is important to forgive absolutely everything and discuss effective methods for forgiveness.

My experience is that it is easy to get lost while pursuing different methods and techniques without being aware of what forgiveness is and why it is important. We may also lack a correct measuring scale to see if forgiveness has worked or not. We will begin the journey by first illuminating the path and then will come back to the techniques at the end.

A classic case

I am a good example of what happens when one has neither the knowledge nor the tools to be able to forgive.

Before my burnout in 2003 that almost killed me and led me to the Shamanic path, I bore a grudge against a good number of people who had done things to me that I did not like: bosses, coworkers, partners, neighbors, friends, family members, and so on. When someone hurt me, I spent a lot of energy trying to deal with my responding negative thoughts. I had no idea how many months or years of my life I had misused by letting other people have power over how I think and feel. This is what happens when we fail to forgive.

For example, I remember the trauma I had experienced in my first serious relationship. We had been together for almost three years, got engaged, and moved into an apartment that we refurbished. One day, she came home from a trip to Paris and told me that she had found another man and wanted to leave me. This came like a lightning bolt from blue sky. I was left traumatized and bewildered.

I became involved in another relationship some time later, and about three months after my next girlfriend moved out, I received two letters from a law firm. She had sued me for everything I possessed, both personally and with my company. I almost had a cardiac arrest when I read the letters. How could she do this? The attorney expenses alone would have taken all I had. My response and hatred were impeding my life, until I met my mentor and teacher, Master Luebeck, in 2004.

He explained to me that I was not going to be happy with a new partner if I did not learn to forgive my former partners for what they had done to me. "How can you give your heart to another woman when you have built a steel wall around it?" he asked me.

It was then that my introduction to the art of setting myself free through forgiveness began. I must admit that it was hard at first, but it was worth it! Without it, I would not be living such an exceptionally happy life together with my wife Maria today.

Why is forgiveness so important?

Many people carry burdens that consume much of their energy, because we fail to forgive ourselves, other people, or situations we have experienced. In reality, we are the only ones that suffer when we are not able to forgive. You can hate another human being for the actions done, but the hatred will hurt you more.

If you are unable to forgive yourself, it creates an internal sabotage program against your health and happiness in life. If you do not forgive others, you build walls around yourself and your heart, which make you lonely and stressed.

By forgiveness, I do not mean to accept the action of another person—instead, you forgive to set yourself free. The more resentment and hatred you carry, the more resources are lost to no avail.

Using pure willpower is not the way to forgiveness, because strong emotions are involved. Full forgiveness from the depths of our heart is difficult to do with our will and consciousness, since this action has limited access to the subconscious part of us, where most of these experiences are stored.

Forgiveness is first and foremost for yourself

Forgiveness is basically for your own sake and not for others—it's the only way you can make peace for yourself. You give a part of the power over your own life to others by allowing yourself to be hurt because of what others have done to you.

Your negative thoughts and feelings toward those you are carrying a grudge against are influencing and controlling how you think and feel in general, and this also affects your health. The people you are not able to forgive are then influencing your life in a destructive way.

The only one who will suffer because of this is you! By learning to forgive, we take back the power over our lives. We cannot allow those who have hurt us to decide how we think, react, or act toward the other people in our lives and ourselves.

Basis for true personality and spiritual development

Forgiveness heals our hearts while we set ourselves free from the past, so we can live in the present. This also provides a foundation for true spiritual development, which cannot be realized unless we have learned the art of forgiveness, since the heart is the key to our soul and essence.

We let go of a huge burden that prevents us from enjoying sound health, meaning, and joy in life every time we choose to forgive someone. You've probably experienced how a weight is lifted off of your heart after you've forgiven your partner or a friend for something they have done or said to you.

Forgiveness means that love, and not fear, stands in the foreground of your decisions and actions. Through forgiveness, you become reunited with the Creative Force, which is a prerequisite for spiritual enlightenment and spiritual self-realization.

The proof of forgiveness

There are no objective yardsticks that can be used to measure whether forgiveness was successful or not, since our heart, our subconscious, and our soul are very complex. But there is one measuring instrument that is 100 percent certain: your everyday life. When you meet someone you have tried to forgive, you will know whether you have truly forgiven, or whether your forgiveness was merely cosmetic.

When you feel unwell, attacked, stressed, or "small," you still have work to do with forgiveness. Another sign of a lack of forgiveness is when negative feelings and thoughts come up when you think about the person or the situation that led to the hurt. You imagine scenarios in which you meet the person and tell them how much they hurt or offended you. These imaginations are often about you "winning" and walking away from the situation with a sense that you finally got the upper hand, and justice has been served.

Once you've forgiven in a successful way, you can meet the person you have forgiven and exchange a few words with this person without getting stressed or feeling unwell. Of course, you can make a decision not to have more close contact with that person, and when you have forgiven them, you will have made your choice without feeling pressured or pained.

Should I forgive everything?

Many people ask me whether to forgive everything and everyone who has hurt or done something wrong against them. The answer is YES—but it does not mean we should accept and approve of everything others have done to us!

It is important that we distinguish between two different ways of being hurt or injured: objective and subjective.

Objective injuries

Objective injury means you have been wounded in a physical and/or psychological manner, such as by physical violence, bullying, robbery, assault, torture, or deception.

An easy way to determine if you have been objectively injured is by checking reality through describing exactly what has happened with your five senses. In this way, you are using clear language that accurately defines what happened in an objective manner—rather than describing what you feel or think happened.

When you have been hurt or injured in an objective manner, you should not accept what was done! You need to determine which measures must be employed for this to not happen again. In such cases, it is a good idea to get help from a professional, such as a psychologist, therapist, or coach.

But if you stop at this point, you are still carrying on the enormous burden of resentment and hatred toward the person or persons who have harmed you. The only one who suffers from this is you. Forgiveness in such cases means setting yourself free. It does not mean to forgive or accept the deed in itself!

It is about taking action, so that this does not happen again. You forgive to free yourself from the burden you are carrying.

Extreme torture

I find it interesting to study biographies; it helps me put my life and my problems into perspective. A while ago, a documentary was shown here in Germany about a young girl who had been subjected to the most inhumane torture by Nazi Germany’s most famous torture doctor, Josef Mengele. After being subjected to the most grotesque human trials over several years, she managed to escape.

Life afterward was an absolute nightmare. It was impossible to live a normal life, because she couldn’t let go of the horrible experiences. They affected her thoughts, feelings, and actions toward herself and others. When interviewed in the documentary, she was an older woman with gray hair and a gentle but firm voice:

"My life changed a few years ago when I realized that the people who had done me harm still had power over my life and were the main reason that I still had an unbearable existence, even after decades of freedom.

The turning point came when I realized that the only thing they did not have power over was my forgiveness for them. Forgiveness set me truly free. It meant that I could again feel and think normally, live happily together with my partner, and enjoy the smiles and laughter of my grandchildren..."


A similar story is found from the father of logotherapy, Dr. Viktor Frankl. In his book, “Man’s Search for Meaning,” (1946) he describes what he calls the ‘will to meaning’ and how he managed to survive the Holocaust by saying ‘yes’ to life, even under tragically inhumane conditions.

While in captivity, he had this life-changing insight: "No one outside myself has power over my inner attitude. They can beat me, they can execute my family, but my thoughts belong to me!

I have the power to decide how I interpret this situation! If I, under these extreme conditions, could keep my identity and my character, then other people can do the same! The last human freedom is to choose your own attitude towards any situation.”

The only one who suffers from not wanting to forgive is the one who has been hurt. If people in these terrible life situations are able to forgive, there is hope for everyone. But forgiveness is impossible without first using the free will to make the choice to forgive. When we can do this, we have taken the first step toward setting ourselves free!

Watch Eva Mozes Kor tell her profound story.

I recommend watching the entire video (15 min.) You can find more information about Eva Mozes Kor here.

Interview with Dr. Viktor Frankl - Finding meaning in difficult times

Subjective injuries

To be hurt in a subjective way means that the ego’s values have been hurt. Critical questions have been raised that challenge our ego structures, beliefs, and meaning, and also expose our negative self-image or worldview.

We all naturally try to hide our poor self-image from the outside world. When this is in danger of being revealed, we perceive it as a threat, causing us to feel hurt. Examples include accusations of stupidity, ugliness, laziness, or incompetence. Since the ego is built on fear, it perceives accusations against its value system as an existential threat.

Reactions such as irritation, anxiety, hatred, resentment, envy, and the like occur on this basis. The biggest challenge to starting a forgiveness process when the ego has been wounded is the ego's intense defense mechanism and fear of change. This process may take some time if you're not used to forgiveness or don’t have help through the process.

Misconceptions about forgiveness

Forgiveness does not mean to offer the other cheek—that would be the same as consent, meaning that other people are allowed to do whatever they want with you.

Forgiveness does not mean:

  • Acting as if nothing has happened.
  • Accepting transgression of boundaries.
  • Remaining in the victim role.
  • Being silent about your experiences.
  • Forcing yourself to believe that the person who hurt you is good and that he or she certainly had good reasons for the actions against you.
  • Taking on responsibility for what happened.
  • Assuming that "it had to be so."
  • Thinking that the responsibility is equally with both parties.
  • Believing that "one must learn to deal with this.”
  • Trying to forget the incident and ignore your own feelings (pretend nothing happened).


Many will not forgive others, because they think that forgiveness means having consented to what happened. This is a big misconception that prevents the process of setting themselves and their heart free.

What about revenge?

Revenge has never brought anything good to humankind. It may lead to short-term satisfaction but always end up with suffering in the long term.

My wife Maria worked for several years as a social worker with felonious criminals, including murderers. One of her clients had murdered his daughter’s abuser and had to serve 20 years in prison. She asked him if it was worth it, and he answered, "I lost the best time in my life, I only got to see my daughter on visitations a few times, and my marriage was destroyed. I lost everything that was dear to me for my revenge. "

None of her clients had ever been happy with their revenge. I've never met anyone who has been happy after revenge either. Besides being dissatisfied, revenge always creates a great emotional and karmic load.

Forgiveness of yourself

Being able to forgive yourself is an unconditional prerequisite for fully being able to forgive others. Characteristics and behavior that I reject in myself are also difficult for me to accept in other people. Sometimes it is difficult to understand what we should forgive ourselves for. In such cases, it might be a good idea to forgive yourself for being in the wrong place at the wrong time.

It is oftentimes difficult to forgive without dealing with feelings of shame, guilt, and anxiety, as well as misleading moral belief patterns. When you forgive yourself, you open your heart in a deep way that allows all types of forgiveness processes to happen more easily. 

The benefits of forgiving

You don’t forgive because of the one who has been hurting you. You forgive because of yourself and your own well-being that has been damaged by hate. In this way, any act of forgiveness being carried out, is an act of love toward yourself. Only when you forgive do you demonstrate that you intend to be gracious to yourself and others.

Here are some of the benefits of forgiveness:

  • Through forgiveness, joy for life returns.
  • Through the heart chakra and its ability to love, it is possible to open up our heart to this world, which in turn is a prerequisite for all forms of enjoyment.
  • Forgiveness counteracts the phenomenon of an inflating ego and its ideas that the only thing that makes us happy is status, money, power, and the like.
  • Forgiveness can be a vital prerequisite for keeping the heart healthy and healing it from disease.
  • Circulation, kidneys, lungs, and the colon can profit from forgiveness (this is referred to in traditional Chinese medicine with the elements of fire, wood, and metal).
  • Forgiveness is a prerequisite for a happy and long-lasting relationship, since there will always be situations where one hurts the other. When forgiveness is not a habit, a prohibitive mountain is built up that can lead to divorce.
  • Whoever forgives themselves opens their subconscious ability to take care of their own well-being, success, and health. Whoever does not forgive themselves will subconsciously attract problems, failures, and disease.
  • Forgiveness is a prerequisite for being able to work optimally together in a team (i.e., read about relationships above).
  • A well-functioning family can only be held together over a long time with the help of forgiveness.

What happens when I do not forgive?

The consequences of not forgiving are extensive. 

  • You suffer. 
  • People around you suffer.
  • Your mental and physical health suffers.
  • Exuberance and joy of life is continually inhibited.
  • Any form of personal and spiritual development related to the heart is blocked.

There are absolutely no excuses not to forgive, except the ego's desire to keep things as they are. The only one who is hurting you in this is yourself!

Is there a shortcut?

I tried for a while to forgive my ex-girlfriends with my consciousness and pure will, with minimal impact. For example, by utilizing the arm test from applied kinesiology, it is possible to determine if you have forgiven another human being completely.

The problem is that forgiveness by sheer willpower is difficult since strong emotions are involved. Walter taught me a unique method for forgiveness: Kanseya Shai'nar heart meditation, which is part of the Three Rays Meditation system. This is an effective method of complete forgiveness from the depths of our heart. As an engineer, I was skeptical, since the method included the use of the Archangels to heal our hearts.

But to my great surprise, it took only three to four weeks with 10 minutes of daily effort before the burdens dropped entirely. It was as if I was a few pounds lighter. Today, when I think of them and what happened, there are no negative feelings coming up. I’m grateful that they were a part of my life for a period of time and for all I've learned afterward. It taught me, among other things, the value of being able to distinguish cause and action from who the person really is, and the value of forgiveness.

These results gave me the motivation to start a systematic forgiveness process toward all those who had hurt me in the past, including my parents. Walter helped me through Phase 1 of the forgiveness process with counseling (see below).

I conducted Phase 2 myself through meditating 10 minutes a day with Kanseya Shai’nar over a longer period of time. The results were indescribable: I felt freer, more balanced, and happier than ever! My life energy grew for each stone released from my heart. Through forgiveness, I set myself free so that I could live my life the way I wanted it, without others involuntarily controlling how I felt, thought, and acted!

Forgiveness is an important topic in my own practice as a spiritual teacher and counselor, where I offer all my clients and students to learn this unique form of meditation (which can be learned in an evening). I'm so amazed by every feedback of forgiveness that I get from my students and the benefits brought to the people and families involved. The value of true forgiveness is gigantic in the quest to create a happy life!

Free yourself with the 7 pillars of forgiveness

My advice to you is to become an expert in forgiveness. In the beginning, it is normal for the process to be a bit slow. Since you're learning something new, it might be a good idea to get some help from an experienced supervisor at first such as a therapist, psychologist, or counselor.

Phase 1: Consciousness and learning

In the first phase, we are clearly defining what happened and finding out what kind of measures need to be used, so the hurt will not happen again. Additionally, we gather lessons learned from what was experienced.

Pillar 1 - Decide to forgive!

Everything starts with making the decision, with your free will, to forgive. This becomes much easier once you understand what forgiveness is and why it is so important to forgive. Once you've done this a few times, it becomes a habit!

Pillar 2 - Objective description!

Note whether the hurt is an objective or subjective harm by describing what happened in a clear and unambiguous manner. Use your five senses. Avoid dream language and words like “I feel,” “think,” “want,” etc.

Pillar 3 - Trifle or serious?

Find out if the problem is about small things or if there is a serious, profound incident. You can handle minor events of everyday life on your own, while serious incidents require the help of a professional.

Pillar 4 - Objective or subjective harm?

- Objective injury: Can the situation be dissolved without further incident? If not, what measures must be initiated to protect you?

- Subjective injury: Was the intent to hurt you on purpose? Is the other person prepared to relate to you in a harmonious way in the future? What negative beliefs about your own self-image were activated? How can these be healed?

Pillar 5 - Give yourself space!

Once you've been hurt, it is important that you take care of yourself as a wounded person. Give the pain space and feel what has happened. Accept that you have been hurt, because only then will you be able to start the process of forgiveness. By ignoring what has happened, we are robbing ourselves of this opportunity.

Pillar 6 - Gather lessons learned.

Use what has happened to help you progress in your life. The experience and knowledge of many negative events in our lives can be used for something positive, such as the opportunities that were present in my own life after the burnout that had almost killed me. It is a good idea to study the biographies of people who have used their biggest traumas as lessons in their life and turned their pain into something positive.

Phase 2: The process of forgiveness

Pillar 7 – Use an effective method for forgiveness that suits your needs.

There are a whole lot of them on the market, such as NLP, systematic constellations following Bert Hellinger’s work, and Kanseya Shai'nar.

The deeper the wound goes, the more it is required for the method to also go into the depths of our heart and soul. There is a limit to what is possible when only working with the consciousness and subconscious.

I always prefer a combination of talk therapy and targeted energy work. Remember that the only evidence of your success is how you, in your everyday life, interact with people you want to forgive.

Want to know more?

Life can be good to live if we choose it ourselves! If you want to learn more about forgiveness and other topics to create a better life, feel free to reach out to me. You can also soon find more free video trainings and articles on this website.

Every conceivable problem can be solved—and oftentimes the solution is sitting right under our nose. I wish you good luck on your path toward good health, joy, happiness, and an enchanting life!

Please contact me if you have suggestions for topics that you would like me to write about. I'm always open to hearing suggestions and answering questions.

GET FREE ACCESS!

Paul E. Wanvig is a Neoteric Shaman, entrepreneur, journalist, author, speaker, bio-hacker, spiritual teacher & encouraging optimist dedicated to helping you and your family live a Fulfilled Life and ending the stress and burnout epidemic by Utilizing the Best of Modern and Ancient Scientific Practices, Medicine and Technology.

Sign up to get VIP access to his upcoming eBooks, online video trainings and valuable weekly health tips for FREE!

The 3 phases of dealing with grief in a healthy and holistic way

The 3 phases of dealing with grief in a healthy and holistic way

Can anything good come out of death?

Written by: Paul E. Wanvig, published in English: 2. March 2019

First published in Medium Magazine (Norway) 04.2015

​Losing a person who is close to us can be a tremendous strain, which can immediately trigger shock, deep pain, and despair. People that have experienced this often wonder: Is there a way to cope with grief that doesn’t involve endless pain, despair, emptiness, and suffering?


In this article, I will share how my wife, Maria, and I have worked through the shock and grief of losing our son who died four months ago.

I am grateful that our extensive education in holistic medicine, shamanism, and psychology in Germany has given us a healthy and holistic manner to deal with death, as has proved helpful during this difficult period.

But when my father died, I had no idea that dealing with grief in a healthy way was possible.

My father's death

I was a typical daddy’s boy who hung around the legs of my father since I was little. He is one of the few people I've met who never said a bad word about others. He was always there for me when I needed help, cared for me, and he took me to all my sporting activities—and there were many of them.

In November 1996, he was found unconscious in the woods when had he gone for a walk with his dog. It was discovered that several of the blood vessels in and outside his heart were clogged. The only thing that could save him was a bypass operation that ended with a major complication, which left his brain without oxygen for more than three minutes.

When he woke up, we knew something was wrong. The next 12 months before his death, on December 23, 1997, were a true emotional nightmare for me. The man I was dearly fond of was gradually fading away. He changed from being a vigorous athlete to a skinny, aggressive man, who was constantly screaming, and he could not recognise me when I came to visit. Seeing all this shook my life fundamentally. As I became more uncomfortable, it became normal that I dreaded to see him.

On the day before Christmas Eve, the phone rang early in the morning, and an icy feeling came over my body. My heart almost stopped beating, because I sensed that... it was over.

Christmas would never be the same again, and the pain lasted for the next ten years.

I did not want to grieve

At the time, I thought that the church had all the knowledge on grief processing. Since I'm not religious, it would have been unnatural for me to go to a priest to help me deal with the grief, so I chose a different approach.

Instead of searching for other help, I decided to put a lid on my endless despair, loss, and self-reproach that I should have done things better, visited him more often, and said the right words in the last year of his life.

I had to control my emotions, since my job required that I was able to make demanding decisions on a daily basis. For many years, I lived like a machine without much feelings. The only important thing in life was to function.

10 years of pneumonia

High fever, bronchitis, and double-sided pneumonia always came creeping every Christmas for the next ten years. Everything that had to do with Christmas placed pressure on the feelings I had hidden for so long in my emotional pressure cooker.

I dreaded every Christmas and wanted to have nothing to do with Christmas trees, Christmas food, and everything else that we associate with Christmas. I am sure it was not easy being my partner through these years.

Through Christmas 1997, I experienced my first burnout. During Christmas celebrations in 2003, I almost lost my life to my last burnout.

With the help of my dear wife, Maria, and my friend, teacher, and mentor, Walter Luebeck, I was able to break this vicious cycle after ten years in which Christmas was synonymous with illness and suffering.

Grief must be processed

This story is a classic example of how untreated grief and trauma can lead to extensive psychological and psychosomatic consequences, such as pneumonia and depression in my case.

Since then, I have met many people and clients who have experienced similar effects. Untreated grief, trauma, and self-blame can have long-lasting and often extensive consequences on all aspects of our life, such as relationships, work, and health.

When we process grief quickly and comprehensively, our suffering is reduced, and so is the risk of associated diseases.

Here I will share the essence of the experience and knowledge I have gained since 2004 about how it is possible to cope with the loss of someone close to us. "The 3 phases to heal grief in a healthy and holistic way" can, of course, be used for all kinds of grief. Examples include when you lose your job, when you suffer serious illness or disability, if you go through divorce, or when you lose a pet that is close to you.

Grief and taboos

Grief is associated with many taboos and dogmas that control much of the behavior of those who grieve and the society around us. When trying to handle grief differently from what is expected, one can encounter negative criticism and slander. Everything might be heard, from "You can’t do it like that," to "You cannot wear colored clothes at a funeral," and "What is wrong with them; it appears that the deceased was not as important to him/her," or even "Enough with this grieving; it must be possible to get on with life."

If you are tough enough to go outside the rules, customs, and expectations of behavior in the event of death, you should expect an extra burden. However, if you are able to cope with the loss in your way, you will emerge strengthened in record time.

What I share here is based on my personal experience and the experience of many clients who often are amazed that it is possible to go trough one of life's most difficult experiences without suffering and self-blame.

The purpose is not to say that you have done something wrong or try to convince you that I'm right. It's okay to disagree with me, since there are many roads to Rome, some of which I don’t know about, that deal with such a universal topic.

What is death?

As a shaman, I see death as a natural part of the lifecycle of everything that is living—what has a start also has an end. We begin to explore the soul's vision in its present incarnation when our soul is born into a new human body.

When the time comes, we leave our earthly temple and proceed to Bardo (the Kingdom of the transitional state), where we make peace with the life we have lived. The last stop is the Kingdom of Light, where our soul plans its next incarnation on this planet​.

This cycle repeats itself ad infinitum until we decide to end the incarnation cycle ourselves, causing our individuality to cease from existence.

In other words, death is something a shaman interacts with as a natural part of life’s many phases. But why did I experience the loss of my own son so intensively when I, as a shaman, see this as a natural part of life—one that is lived an infinite number of times?

Is grief a disease?

As a shaman, I seek to observe nature and its natural processes when I have questions about how life works. In my quest to find the answer to whether grief is a disease that is man-made, I ended up observing animals living freely in the wild that are not influenced by humans. Here are a few examples:

Canada geese are very emotional beings. A Canadian goose grieves when it loses its partner. They can remove themselves from the group to stay by themselves and swim around in despair, sobbing sorrowfully.

Dolphins often have difficulties in accepting death and the loss of a family member, and they will often stay with the deceased dolphin for days.

Elephants are also extremely emotional beings with close ties to other elephants. These deep ties could lead to intense grief when one they are fond of the one that dies. Elephants are known to shed tears, bury their dead, go into depression, and starve themselves as a reaction to a loss.

Chimpanzees are known to despair when they lose close members of their group. The animals will often cry and refuse to eat food in the mourning period. Gorillas also show sadness and concern for their dead, whom they also sometimes bury.

Grief, not concerning humans, exists in nature. But the big difference between humans and animals in the wild is the length of the grieving process and the animals' capacity to continue living their life without letting what happened affect them over the long term in destructive ways.

Canada geese are monogamous with a partner throughout their lives. When the partner dies, the goose can mourn for several weeks and then seek a new partner, since this is a necessity for survival.

However, when humans do not let go of the pain and suffering even years after losing someone close, this is something that does not exist in nature and must therefore be called a man-made disease. In my opinion, this phenomenon is deserving of a separate medical diagnosis (today, a plethora of different diagnoses are used for symptoms that occur, such as depression and anxiety).

In my personal experience and those of my clients, it is possible to avoid grief as a disease by using "The 3 phases to heal grief in a healthy and holistic way."

The art of being human

We humans are social beings who depend on strong social structures in order to survive. Without this genetic "basic programming," it would have been impossible to develop from the caveman stage to the complex social structures we have in our society today.

When a close bond to one we love has been broken, it feels like a shot across the bow of our existence. The stronger the bond is, the greater the threat feels to our own emotional, physical, and economic existence.

The fact that we react so strongly when we lose someone we love is therefore no wonder. This is an automated response from our genetic survival system. In other words, there is a limit to what intellectual knowledge, experience, and wisdom means at the moment when we lose our loved ones. Our automated genetic system turns on and supersedes all intellectual knowledge, judgment, and experience.

Although Maria and I had thorough knowledge of the processes around death, we could not prevent ourselves from feeling like we had hit rock-bottom after losing our child, since none of us can override our human genetic programming with intellect or experience.

The art is to accept that we are human beings with the need to let out deep sorrow and grief when our existence is threatened. We are not cold machines without feelings that are just here to function—we are humans of flesh and blood who are here to live!

Does this mean that knowledge is not worth anything when we experience losing our loved ones? Definitely not! Knowledge and insight into a holistic way of processing grief will give us the map that allows us to find a safe way out of the complex jungle of emotions, rather than being stuck with frustration, emptiness, pain, and suffering.

The map that shows the way home

It’s helpful to have a model that gives us a clear view and understanding of how we find our way out of the endless jungle of emptiness, pain, and frustration. For us, this has been very helpful in our own mourning process over these past few months.

The map that showed us the way home after the tragedy of losing our son consists of three phases that I call 'The 3 phases to heal grief in a healthy and holistic way," as follows:

Phase 1: Treatment and healing of the shock

Phase 2: The Grieving Process

Phase 3: Forgiveness


Before you go ahead with phases 2 and 3, there is a prerequisite that the shock is treated first. Without this step, it will be extremely difficult to go through a healthy grieving process and to forgive ourselves, our dear one, and other involved parties. Phases 2 and 3 can be done simultaneously.

Phase 1: Treatment and healing of the shock

The shock I experienced when the doctors said there is nothing they could do for our child, and then when Wotan died, had set me completely beside myself. I had never felt so helpless. Feeling how the numbness was creeping over me, I was no longer able to cope with the world around me. It was like stepping into a bubble. I saw only Maria and myself, while the world around me became more blurred.

When we arrived home after Maria was signed out of hospital, I could not feel anything. The numbness was so intense that it was even hard for me to let the tears flow, because I simply could not comprehend what had happened. The world around us did not interest me, and I felt completely helpless, desperate, and completely incapable of knowing what was going to happen next.

These are typical symptoms of shock. When we first experience such shock, there isn’t much we can do by ourselves. In such moments, it feels like every breath and every activity presents a struggle to survive.

Seek help for treating the shock as quickly as possible

The deeper the shock is, the more competent help you need. It's not possible to process the grief and let go of what has been for as long as we are in a state of shock, which can last and give repercussions for years if it is not treated.

People who are locked in a cycle of pain, despair, emptiness, and suffering year after year, because they have lost their loved ones and are unable to let go, are still suffering from the consequences of an untreated shock. It is, in my experience, impossible to completely let go and move on with our lives without that shock being treated correctly and completely.

I have clients who continue to suffer for years after a loss. The first thing I take care of to help them is healing the shock and its repercussions that were never treated adequately. The faster you get help to treat the shock, the better.

The day Maria was discharged from the hospital, our good friend and teacher, Walter Luebeck, had visited us. One of the first things he did was to set up a complete holistic program for shock treatment. Today, we are very thankful we got help to start the treatment so quickly; it took no more than about two weeks before we could feel ourselves and the world around us again.

Who can help you treat the shock?

Severe shock and trauma treatment should always be left to experts who have special training in this, such as emergency psychologists and other specialists. Others may get help from nurses or midwives who are specially trained in helping people through such difficult times. Others get the help of a priest, coach, therapist, or a good friend.

We all have different methods, and the most important thing is that you seek out someone who is competent and whom you can trust. It is important that a shock is treated and healed completely. If you are suffering from loss, I urgently recommend that you consult a qualified therapist for treating shock, since the long-term consequences can be stressful both physically and mentally if care is not rendered in a professional manner.

Phase 2: The Grieving Process

After the shock has settled, the most challenging phase follows: the grieving process.

Grief is often defined as "an expression of loss, sadness, emptiness, betrayal, pain, and/or despair after the death of someone close."

While this expresses how grief feels or is experienced, it does not define what the grieving process is.

Let me share with you my definition of what a grief process is and how this should be done in a healthy and holistic way: "Grief is the process of letting go of what you've lost and what has been, while taking care of memories, experiences, knowledge, and adventures that you had shared together, and then adapting and reorienting your life in the light of the experience, knowledge, wisdom, strength, insight, and opportunities that arise during the process of letting go of what has been."

(Intense grief can also be experienced if we lose our job, become disabled, go through divorce, have children move out, etc.)

After death, our soul normally goes on to the divine Kingdom of Light via Bardo (the Kingdom of the transitional state) for planning its next incarnation. The soul itself does not suffer after death. It is only we who are left behind who often fail to accept that the one we love has left us.

In other words, grief is a subjective and self-centered experience that only has to do with ourselves and not with the one who has left us. The one who dies usually lets go of you and what has been at once (there are, however, exceptions to this).

The harder it is for us to let go of the person who has left us, the harder it is for him or her to release themselves and proceed on the way to their forefathers.

In other words: With our inability to let our loved ones be allowed to proceed on their path, we can prevent them from finding their way to the Kingdom of Light. The soul can possibly get stuck in Bardo, because he or she feels sorry for us and wants to stay close to comfort us. Our inability or unwillingness to let go can therefore have major consequences not only for ourselves, but also for those we love.

Gaining insight into what death really is

An important foundation for a healthy and holistic grief process of letting go is to acquire a good understanding of what death really is, since there are many opinions about this that are often based on fear. The more fear is involved, the harder it is to let go.

After the shock is integrated and processed, I give my clients access to my video seminar about death and reincarnation, which shows what happens after death from a shaman’s point of view. I then discuss the topics that are addressed with them. My experience shows that it is much easier to let go of their loved ones when they know what really happens after death.

If you are reading this article to help deal with your loss, I recommend that you contact a competent and experienced shaman or priest to gain insights into this topic. It will considerably quicken the process of letting go of the one you have lost.

The 4 steps for a healthy approach to the grieving process

A healthy approach to the grieving process consists of four steps. Here I also share a few examples of what Maria and I experienced after we lost our son:

Step 1 - Accept

Accept that the one we love has departed and that he or she is allowed to go on without us. Take deliberate actions (e.g. through different type of rituals) showing that you have accepted that your loved one has passed on and that you want to make peace with what has happened.

For Maria and me, it was not so difficult to accept that Wotan should be allowed to continue his way without us. The trigger for this was the shamanistic funeral ritual that Walter held for us at the oak tree where Wotan was buried. There, we opened up our hearts and consciously let him go. On one hand, we wanted to keep him here, but it would have been a self-centered act that would have made it difficult for him to move on. We showed real love from the depths of our hearts by consciously saying to him, during the ritual, that we let go completely and wish him well on his journey. The peace that came over us at that moment is one of the most beautiful experiences I've ever had.

Step 2 - Remember

Remember and dwell on everything valuable that the deceased has given your life as long as you've known each other. For this step, you may want to use a diary in which you can document all of the good things.

Although Wotan was not with us so many months, he was so valuable to us.
By touching our hearts in a way that we have never experienced before, he helped us to understand the value of life in a deeper way while everyday issues were put in an entirely different perspective. Having lost a child, we see the world with different eyes. What were previously problems are now insignificant details in a landscape where meaning, depth, and joy of life are at the center. This is perceived as if we are becoming much more authentic compared to daily life itself. Wotan also brought Maria and me so much closer.

During this period, I acquired extensive and valuable knowledge in the treatment of multi-resistant bacteria with natural active substances, which gave amazing results even when the strongest antibiotics did not work. This period of time also led me into an exciting path studying how the best holistic medical clinics in the world are treating and curing cancer and other chronic diseases in a holistic manner. Without Maria being so ill at the hospital, I probably would not have opened up my eyes to this exciting medical universe.

Step 3 - Adapt

Adaptation, and, if necessary, reorientation of your own life based on all the experience, knowledge, wisdom, strength, insight, and opportunities that you have become aware of through the grieving process.

What we have experienced will help shape our lives and our relationship with each other. The wisdom, knowledge, and power that we have been given by Wotan's death have changed a part of how we relate to each other, our students, clients, and people around us. By today, I have even greater acceptance that people around me may use their free will to make the choices they want, even if it means years of suffering and problems. Before, I took it somewhat personally when one of my clients or friends did not want to do even the simplest and basic things for recovery from, for example, cancer. Today, I understand that love also means that you must let others walk their own path and accept the choices they make with their free will, even if this results in a lot of pain and suffering.

Step 4 - Forgive

Forgiveness of yourself, the one you've lost and other parties involved (this step continues on in Phase 3).

If you are stuck on one or more of the steps, it may be a good idea to seek the help of someone with experience. In addition to good conversations and therapy, methods of energy medicine (such as flower essences, homeopathy, acupuncture, various forms of healing, etc.) could be helpful.

Phase 3: Forgiveness

In most cases, a healthy and holistic approach to the grieving process and forgiveness go hand in hand. Completing the grieving process without first having forgiven yourself, the one you've lost, and any other parties involved is difficult. Because forgiveness is a complex subject, it becomes a separate phase in the recipe for a healthy and holistic healing of grief.

You can get a basic introduction on the topic of forgiveness in the article "Free yourself by forgiving! Learn the 7 pillars of true forgiveness."

One of the first things that struck us after the shock subsided was self-blame. What could we have done better? What if we had gone to the hospital earlier? What if we had gathered more knowledge about problems that can occur during pregnancy in advance? What if we had eaten healthier or taken other supplements? What if, what if, what if...

The feeling of self-reproach was overwhelming at first. It did not help much that doctors, midwives, gynecologists, all the other experts, and Walter said that whatever we would have done would not have changed the outcome.

Self-incrimination can only be cured by forgiving yourself, because you did the best you could. It can be difficult to forgive only by our will, and often a lot more insight into the topic of forgiveness is needed until we manage to let go.

It is also important that you forgive the one who has abandoned you. It may be hard to accept that our loved ones have left us here alone. Additionally, forgiving all others involved (such as family and doctors) is a good step to take.

My favorite method for forgiveness is Kanseya Shai'nar, which is a special meditation method for forgiveness from the depths of the heart. By using this method, the self-reproach vanished over the next few weeks.

Can anything good come out of death?

This is a sensitive issue that can be easily misunderstood. To say to someone who has lost a loved one that something good can come out of it could be perceived as cold and insensitive.

But my life experience tells me that even the greatest trauma in my life has always had a gigantic potential of opportunities that have been there for me in retrospect. At the moment the trauma occurs, and in the subsequent weeks/months afterward, it is, of course, difficult to see a positive outlook, because the shock is blocking our ability to see and think clearly. But when the worst of the storm has settled, it is possible to see the landscape that opens up—if we want to see it.

The question is whether we are willing to open ourselves up to the good that can come out of a situation that may seem hopeless at the time.

One of my basic philosophies is that I live my own life out of the premise that there is a solution to every thinkable problem. The larger the problem is, the greater are the opportunities waiting for us on the other side—if we are willing to accept them—which then is a conscious choice we make.

The three most extensive traumas I experienced so far in my life have given me more strength, wisdom, and happiness in retrospect than anything else.

The first trauma was losing my father. Although the first few years afterward were filled with emptiness and pain, he had showed me the way to the person I am today.

The second trauma was a burnout that almost killed me in 2003, one that would change my life completely and build the foundation for the wonderful life I'm allowed to live today.

The third trauma was losing my son, Wotan. Although it happened only four months ago, I have an extreme appreciation for the time he was with us and the possibilities he opened up in our lives.

To write these words to you has been a healing process in itself for me. I hope my experience will be of benefit to you and yours. I appreciate hearing from you with your thoughts and experiences about the grief and mourning process.

GET FREE ACCESS!

Paul E. Wanvig is a Neoteric Shaman, entrepreneur, journalist, author, speaker, bio-hacker, spiritual teacher & encouraging optimist dedicated to helping you and your family live a Fulfilled Life and ending the stress and burnout epidemic by Utilizing the Best of Modern and Ancient Scientific Practices, Medicine and Technology.

Sign up to get VIP access to his upcoming eBooks, online video trainings and valuable weekly health tips for FREE!

The shock of losing our own child – Is there a meaning behind everything?

The shock of losing our own child

Is there a meaning behind everything?

Written by: Paul E. Wanvig, published in English: 1. March 2019

First published in Medium Magazine (Norway) 03.2015

This was supposed to be my year. Everything was laid out and ready for the most productive, exciting, and meaningful year of my life so far. I had planned on starting the New Year by announcing on my new English-language blog the wonderful news that I was going to be a father. This was a deep desire for both Maria and me, one that would finally become a reality.

On Christmas Eve 2014, we passed the critical time for pregnancy: the 12th week. We could relax more now, since the probability of losing a child after this time is minimal.

What happened two weeks later is the biggest trauma I have ever experienced and probably the worst fear of all parents—losing your own child.


Why am I sharing this with you?

The reason I am sharing my story with you is mostly for my own benefit. For many years, I've shared my experiences and recipes for solving mostly any problem that has arisen in my life with my Norwegian readers.

This time there is no step-by-step solution that provides the recipe for how such a trauma can be healed in general—for I do not believe that one exists. But maybe my story can give hope to others who are experiencing the tragedy of losing their own child or inspire someone who has family members or friends that have lost a child.

Back in 1997, my father passed away and I did the opposite of what I am doing now. I had suppressed what had happened, which led to severe physical and mental problems a few years later. By sharing my loss tragedy with you now, I am taking important steps forward in my own healing process. Hopefully some good will come out of this, both for you and for me.

Massive bleeding

The morning of January 5th 2015, I saw Maria looking chalk pale with tears in her eyes. "I have massive bleeding and I'm afraid for our child." My heart stopped almost completely, and it felt like cold knives began stabbing my back.

The gynecologist urged us to come in at once, and the ultrasound image showed that everything was in order. "Such things are not abnormal," she said to calm us down. "If this gets worse, I recommend that you go to the hospital. As it looks now, there is nothing differently the hospital can do either."

When we returned home, everything went back to normal. We breathed sighs of relief, believing that everything would be alright.

What happened over the next five days, I think only Maria can describe. She suffered intensive pain that came and went continuously. The feeling of helplessness came over me as I watched my beloved wife suffer without being able to do anything to help her. Today I understand this better—the intense distress was labor pain.

The emergency room shock

On Friday, January 9th, we went to the emergency room, because the pain was unbearable. The shock that confronted us there is hard to describe. The ultrasound image showed that the child had slipped down into the birth canal. The chief physician and the other doctors had never seen anything like it before: a strong and vital child in the birth canal at this time in pregnancy.

For Maria and me, this was the biggest shock of our lives. The doctors said there was nothing they could do, they could only hope that the child would die quickly and get out so that Maria could be free from pain.

These words were inconceivable to us. We had so much looked forward to the birth of our child, and now we hear that they hope our baby dies quickly.

Helplessness

I had never felt so helpless before. The feeling of numbness came over me, and I was no longer able to perceive the world around me. It was like stepping into a timeless bubble. I saw only Maria and me, while the world around us became more and more blurred. The shock began to take over, and it was good I did not know that this was only the beginning.

Survival instinct

All thoughts and reactions for self-preservation began in me, and survival instinct took over my actions. What could I do for the baby to get back into its proper place? What could I do to help Maria? What if my worst nightmare would come true that I also was losing Maria—what would I do then?

Thoughts rushed chaotically through my head. Stress hormones were pumped intensively into my blood stream, and all of me was on alert.

I've never been so glad that I've worked with meditation for so many years; this made me able to think clearly instead of flipping out.

My job

My task was to help Maria in the best possible ways, both mentally and physically. Although it was impossible for me to understand what she was going through in this situation, I could help by being present and making sure she had everything she needed at any time.

Over the next six days, I shuttled between hospital and home. I prepared organic food for Maria, brought clean clothes, and took care of our dog, Emilia.

On the one hand, it was good that I had something to do all the time, but it was incredibly difficult, since I had no one to take care of me. The nights were the hardest to deal with, since I had to be home to take care of Emilia. Lying awake without knowing how it was going with my beloved wife was very difficult.

The nightmare becomes a reality

On Saturday, January 10th at 8:20 a.m., my cellphone rang. My blood froze and tears ran down my cheeks when Maria told me that the child had come and that she was going to have an emergency operation. It's hard to describe what was happening inside me then, but I remember my intense fear that something bad would happen to Maria.

Emergency operation

I had never before dressed so quickly. I arrived at the hospital just in time to accompany Maria down to the surgery department where they normally take in emergencies that come by ambulance or helicopter.

Nobody explained to me what happened and why she needed surgery. The waiting time and uncertainty were like torture. Every minute felt like an hour. After 90 minutes, a nurse came out and was about to pass me without saying a word. I stopped her and asked if she knew how the surgery went. "Everything seems to have gone well, and she is lying in the recovery room now", she said briefly before moving on.

A while later, the surgeon informed me that everything had gone perfectly well and that he hoped he would never see us again. The pressure was relieved and tears flowed when I took Maria’s hand as she was still groggy from the anesthetic.

Infection

One of the consequences of the operation was a major infection that the doctors were not able to control even with the strongest intravenous antibiotics. "We have not seen this before," we heard again. "We'll try another type of antibiotic and see if it works better."

The next day, the infection markers increased; this indicated that the infection had become worse. The fear that multiresistant hospital bacteria had gained a foothold in Maria was intense.

Our first son

Our son, Wotan Dompierre Wanvig, was born at 8:00 am on Saturday, January 10th, 2015. He died in Mary's hands at 8:01 a.m.

To see my own son lying dead in my hands was heartbreaking. He fit into my hand, being only 12 cm. long, a miracle with hands, feet, fingers, toes, and nails that never came to say the words “dad” or “mom.”

The priest and the undertaker

On Sunday, we were visited by the hospital's priest. Although we have no relationship with religion, it was incredibly good to talk with someone who was an expert at helping people in our situation. She explained to us all the details about what was going to happen, including that since the child had come so far in its development, it was mandatory according to German law to have a funeral.

The next day, the undertaker came. How to talk about the experience of discussing the funeral of my own child with a priest and the undertaker is something I’m not able to fathom. On one hand you are glad that someone is available to tell you what's going to happen so that uncertainty goes away, but on the other hand, you want to escape everything and hope that it is all a bad dream.

The desire to suppress

The desire to suppress what had happened was overwhelming. However, both the priest and everyone else we've talked to—both experts and those who had experienced this themselves—said that suppressing our feelings is the worst thing we can do.

We heard many stories about how things had gone for parents who had repressed the grief of losing their child. Disease, relationship problems, and years of suffering were some of the aftereffects.

Everyone said it was important that we gave space in our family to Wotan as our first child and that we gave him a name and a burial.

An unbearable shock

Maria was allowed to leave the hospital five days later. The shock was overwhelming, and neither of us was able to think clearly about the days to come. The only things our world consisted of were tears, numbness, and deep pain.

The same day she was discharged, we got a visit from our dear friend, teacher, and mentor Walter Lübeck, who helped us understand what had happened, why it happened, and how the road ahead looked.

Walter gave us several essences and homeopathic remedies that would help us process the shock and trauma. Starting with this at an early stage was helpful, in addition to our talks to professionals and others who had experienced the same trauma.

Finding the right place for the burial

The next thing we had to do was find the right place to bury our son. We wanted to have a shamanic funeral ritual in a natural grave by a tree in the forest. In Germany, we have special “peace forests” (e.g., Friedwald) where we could buy a tree and bury our son there.

We eventually found a suitable location: a great oak tree overlooking a small lake and a small river in a beautiful forest. That was the right place, and Maria and I also will be buried there when the time comes.

The funeral

On Thursday, January 29th, we buried Wotan at the root of an oak tree with a beautiful shamanistic funeral ritual led by our good friend Walter. As I write these words, tears and sadness overwhelm me; it was only five days ago that I stood there with a shovel and buried my son with my own hands. What I experienced is something I cannot put into words.

I find it all still incomprehensible and surreal, and it will certainly take a few weeks before I come back to myself.

The grief

After the worst shock had subsided, deep grief came creeping over us. For me, grief is a process of letting go of what has been and finding a new path for my life.

How we humans mourn is personal, but I'm convinced that we can choose to suffer or go through the process filled with love and forgiveness. I know people who have lost a loved one, and the rest of their lives had been destroyed with suffering. But I also know many people who have actively chosen the other way—the path of love and forgiveness.

No one who dies would wish that his or her family should suffer because of it. The soul passes on to the Kingdom of Light after death, where it plans its next incarnation. In other words, prolonged suffering is only hurting ourselves and our nearest yet has absolutely no influence on the soul that has passed on.

A wise man once said the following to me: "Death is a part of being human that we need to learn to deal with. Everyone has a choice: We can unconsciously go through this guided by our inner desire of suffering and self-destruction, or we can choose to consciously go through a grieving process by letting go of what has been and take with us the good that this human has given us in the time that it was with us."

Grief is something that takes time. It is now a little over three weeks since we lost Wotan as I continue to write about my experience, and I'm not nearly finished with my grief. But what is certain is that both Maria and I know that something good will come out of this eventually, as it has always done after the major disasters earlier in our lives. We just do not know yet quite what that ‘good’ might be.

How should I support you?

How should I relate to someone who is experiencing a trauma like this? I do not think there is a definitive answer to this, since we all have different needs. The best option is probably to ask the person directly how you can give support in the best way possible.

Flowers or other gifts are what I personally need least. I would rather not have to tell the story over and over again—it's one of the reasons why I'm writing these words. Then everyone is informed, and those who want to support me know what I need.

“I think of you.”

The most supportive thing for me is to hear, "I'm thinking of you," or "You are in my thoughts." Simple gestures can let me know that I am not alone. I had no idea of the strength of these words until now.

To me, this is like tiny lights that illuminate the darkness. The more of these small beacons of support, heartfelt wishes, and similar comments that reach my blog or inbox, the more the darkness is dispelled. The effect on me is outstanding, and I am so grateful for all the supportive words and actions that are coming our way—they mean so much!

What had we done wrong?

‘What had we done wrong?’ was one of the first things we discussed. Was this our fault? Could we have done anything differently? Should we have known better?

It’s probably normal that we tried to find the cause in ourselves to be able to find the answer to why this happened. The reality is that all parents who have gone through the same have done their best, including us. Maybe there are some things that could have been done differently if we would have had more knowledge. Maybe there are things we should have done differently. Maybe we should have gone to the hospital earlier, although the doctors said that it would not have changed anything. Maybe we should have informed physicians and specialists we work with here in Germany at an earlier time. Maybe, maybe, maybe.

What has happened has happened, and there is absolutely nothing we can do to reverse this now. Torturing ourselves with reproaches that we should have done differently or somehow have made better decisions helps nobody; it only destroys us.

As shamans, we are trained to listen to nature, which is much more wise and complex than a human can ever comprehend. This is what nature chose at this time. There is nothing we need to understand right now; it is something that we just have to accept. But this does not mean that we should not learn from what has happened. Learning acceptance is probably the most important thing we can take with us from any crisis.

Forgiveness

Forgiveness is a very important part of the mourning process if you choose to walk the path of love. Without forgiveness, the suffering may continue indefinitely.

For Maria and me, actively forgiving ourselves was the most important thing for us to do in order to release the enormous burden hanging on our shoulders. This will also set us free.

The problem with forgiveness is that it does not work very well with the use of willpower. We must have a deeper approach in order to reach the hidden programs of the subconscious and the depths of our hearts.

I have written a longer article on the subject of forgiveness and how this can be done to set us free. 

Our relationship

In such a situation, it is easy for conflicts to arise in the relationship if one fails to communicate with the other about what has happened. We know couples who have lost children and who would not talk to each other about it. After twenty years, they still have problems in their relationships because of what they had never put into words.

Thank goodness that Maria and I are talking about what has happened. Neither of us runs away, even though it is difficult. When we manage to ride out a storm like this, I think it would take a lot to ruin our relationship.

Is there a meaning to everything?

Is there a higher meaning behind losing our own child? This is difficult to answer, since we comprehend only a tiny slice of the reality we live in. Also, the answer always depends on the point of view from which the situation is observed. From the Creative Force (God) point of view, a spiritually enlightened and self-realized point of view, or from a human point of view, everyone gives different answers.

A better question to ask is what we will make of what is happening to us. How do we create meaning out of what has happened? This is entirely our own choice. We can choose to be the victim and continue suffering, or we can use what has happened—to learn from it and grow.

How we can turn this tragedy into something good for others and ourselves is, of course, unclear to Maria and me at present. Even if we perceive the contours of our reality, we must allow ourselves to grieve, as humans of flesh and blood, with the feelings that fill our lives right now.

What is certain is that we have chosen to incarnate into this world as human beings with all the joys and sorrows that this existence has to offer. Escaping from what is difficult in our lives is not an option.

In a few weeks, we will see the world and ourselves with other eyes. Until then, we are grateful from the depths of our hearts for all those who care about us.

GET FREE ACCESS!

Paul E. Wanvig is a Neoteric Shaman, entrepreneur, journalist, author, speaker, bio-hacker, spiritual teacher & encouraging optimist dedicated to helping you and your family live a Fulfilled Life and ending the stress and burnout epidemic by Utilizing the Best of Modern and Ancient Scientific Practices, Medicine and Technology.

Sign up to get VIP access to his upcoming eBooks, online video trainings and valuable weekly health tips for FREE!

>